Today started off so well, but this after noon took a turn for the worse... Here's my day in a nutshell if you're interested...

I woke up, did the usual breakfast --> shower thing, then decided to head down town for a bit. I pottered around the mall, picked up a DVD and book I had ordered in, then went to the art shop and bought some ceramics paint then continued on to the hardware store and bought my brother his requested birthday present.

Later this afternoon I went to pick up some dinner, and just when I thought I was home for the day, my car begins to get sludgy ... I know what this means, it means I have no fuel. So I manage to get to a petrol station without any major dramas, and the guy filling up my car informs me I have no petrol cap on my car. My petrol has been cyphoned AGAIN for the third time in 3 months. They stole my petrol, and my petrol cap so tomorrow I have to go and buy yet another fuel cap for my car. I have decided though I'm going to leave it at my brothers house now so it's not visable. If these THEIVES think they're getting my petrol a fourth time I'm going to tell them it isn't going to happen, I can't afford it to. I work an hour away from where I live so I need every drop of petrol I can get.

So needless to say I was upset. Dad yelled at ME about it, even though there was nothing we could do about it. The fuel had been taken, the cap stolen, so there was no point getting angry about something we couldn't fix. It upset me, I wasn't asking him to fix it, I was just telling him what went on. I wouldn't have been so upset if it weren't for the little conversation we had earlier in the afternoon ...

The conversation where he forgot my birthday ... You would think after 21 years he would remember when his only daughter's birthday was, but it pretty much confirmed all suspicion I had - He really doesn't care about me. I know this, I have known for some time, but actually having it confirmed cut me right to the bone, and I lost it. I hid in my room and I let myself cry for the first time (non work related) in ages. Mum had to come and give me a hug to pull me back together again.

Why can't I just accept that fact and get on with my life?