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Better Than Yesterday
UptownMastermind


Age: 30
Sex: M
Location: Uptown NYC
State: New York

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Memory Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Thanks for all you've done
I've missed you for so long
I can't believe you're gone
You still live in me
I feel you in the wind
You guide me constantly

I've never knew what it was to be alone, no
Cause you were always there for me
You were always there waiting
And ill come home and I miss your face so
Smiling down on me
I close my eyes to see

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me

I carry the things that remind me of you
In loving memory of
The one that was so true
Your were as kind as you could be
And even though you're gone
You still mean the world to me

I've never knew what it was to be alone, no
Cause you were always there for me
You were always there waiting
But now I come home and it's not the same, no
It feels empty and alone
I can't believe you're gone

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me

I'm glad he set you free from sorrow
I'll still love you more tomorrow
And you will be here with me still

And what you did you did with feeling
And You always found the meaning
And you always will
And you always will
And you always will

And I know, you're a part of me
And it's your song that sets me free
I sing it while I feel I can't hold on
I sing tonight cause it comforts me

-Alter Bridge, "In Loving Memory"


I'm not exactly sure why this week of all weeks, I've been thinking so heavily of my father. I know that after five + years, some people would be able to go quite a while without a tear, but I've gone three straight days stepping away from my desk and losing it. Even a couple of weeks ago on what would have been his 67th birthday, I was more or less in a celebratory mood. Yet, lately, it feels like he died over and over again.

I think of so many things that I'm trying to make better and as they fall by the wayside, his face keep appearing. Then I figured it out. I've been wondering what he would do if he was me. Wondering what would have happened if he was still alive. Would I have struggled so much at Babson? Would I be as close to my family as I am now? Would I have came back to New York after graduating? Hell, would I have even gone to California?

I dared to ask myself the question "what would I want most in the world right now?" The job, the continued relationship, the palm trees and 70-degree temps, the family visits, the freedom? All of those things, sure. I'd kill just to have one more day with him. He was probably the only person that could ensure that things would be okay without saying a word.

Miss Him Terribly




I'm sorry you're feeling sad. I just lost my dad 2 months ago to cancer. He was only 49. Miss him so much right now too. So I'm right there where you are. take care, hun. [mnmchick2004] 10/17/2006 12:50:44 AM
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