It's been a really difficult few days.

I received the phone call Thursday night that my brother was being admitted to one of the hospitals where I work. My dad wasn't really sure what questions to ask, so I called the nurse and spoke to her.

He was in liver and kidney failure. At 30.

So we all went down. He looked so sick. They had him on antibiotics because his white blood cell count was high, which indicated an infection.

His bloodwork was a true and rightful mess. His kidneys, we later found out, were 75% shut down. His liver function tests were above 3,000. They're normally supposed to be under 100.

His cardiac blood markers were also off. They think he might have had a mild heart attack.

I spent pretty much the whole day there yesterday.

He was released today in much better shape.

God. He's 30.

It puts way too much in perspective.

I'm exhausted. I'll probably write more later, but maybe not. I have a lot going through my mind. We never really saw eye-to-eye, but for him to be so close to death at 30.... Fucking 30...