The fact that I am an ultra feminine girlie girl, does not escape me. The fact that I continually get slammed for it however, baffles me. Just what is wrong with it? I like shoes, make up, looking nice, I like the way I feel when I put on a great pair of heels, I like smelling good and I like it even more when someone else notices I smell nice because of my perfume. And I like attention dammit! I am a glorified attention whore! ... I just needed to get that out....

So, I took the noble road this week and I'm actually proud that I did it. And amazed if I'm a bit honest since generally I'm too selfish to look at the big picture. Also in this big picture is (on the very outer edge, mind you) is that I'd like to find a healthy relationship. I don't just mean a romantic one, because while I want that too, I want healthy relationships with everyone in my life. There are very few people I can honesly say that I have ties to just because. Usually there's some reason or common bonding thing that isn't neceaarily a good thing. Like my work relationships, they're in place because I work there and outside of the workplace, they don't exist. I have very few female friends that I consider true insiders, aside from Cait and you, Jilly. You guys are my girls and I love you, but it's harder now that we're all spread out across the U.S. I guess I need an insider here. Or at least someone I can be totally honest with, because it gets hard keeping everything to myself. And Jilly, my dear, I know you're a phone call away, but you have your own stuff to deal with so I hate unloading my stuff on you too.

Thankfully, this week the office is closed because Doc is on vacation. It'll be an easy week and refreshing after all the drama of last week. I'm also going to the gym tomorrow. My goal is 5 times a week, Monday thru Friday, with weekends off. I want to get into better shape for the  Susan G Komen Run for the Cure this year. Every year I used to participate in some sorta run/walk for charity and the past few years I haven't. I used to feel good about doing things like this. I like helping. I hope this actually helps with the semi-depressive state I've had for the past year. I'm trying to make my life more like my old life. My pre-wyoming state, if you will.

I am growing used to this out here. It's not so bad anymore, especially since I don't feel like it's for good anymore. Life is a journey I suppose and mine has brought me here for now. Suck it up and enjoy the ride. That's all about me for now since I don't want to bother even writing about the family drama. I hope everyone else has a great night. (And ignore any typo's, it's late and I'm too lazy to recheck this).