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Deliberation
by Prone2Wander
Location: far from home
Age: 29    Sex : F

Through Painted Deserts 9/15/2006

From "Through Painted Deserts" by Donald Miller

It's a living book, this life; it folds out in a million settings, cast with a billion beautiful characters, and it is almost over for you. It doesn't matter how old you are; it is coming to a close quickly, and soon the credits will roll and all your friends will fold out of your funeral and drive back to their homes in cold and still and silence. And they will make a fire and pour some wine and think about how you once were... and feel a kind of sickness at the idea that you will never again be.

So soon you will be in that part of the book where you are holding the bulk of the pages in your left hand, and only a thin wisp of the story in your right. You will know by the page count, not by the narrative, that the Author is wrapping things up. You begin to mourn its ending, and want to pace yourself slowly toward its closure, knowing the last lines will speak of something beautiful, of the end of something long and earned, and you hope the thing closes out like last breaths, like whispers about how much and who the characters have come to love, and how authentic the sentiments feel when they have earned a hundred pages of qualification.

And so my prayer is that your story will have involved some leaving and some coming home, some summer and some winter, some roses blooming out like children in a play. My hope is your story will be about changing, about getting something beautiful born inside you, about learning to love a woman or a man, about learning to love a child, about moving yourself around water, around mountains, around friends, about learning to love others more than we love ourselves, about learning oneness as a way of understanding God. We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and the resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn't it?

It might be time for you to go. It might be time to change, to shine out.

I want to repeat one word for you:

Leave.

Roll the word around on your tongue for a bit. It is a beautiful word, isn't it? So strong and forceful, the way you have always wanted to be. And you will not be alone. You have never been alone. Don't worry. Everything will still be here when you get back. It is you who will have changed.



I've heard of this book, but never read it. I take it it's a good book?? I can't believe I'll be leaving Maine, and therefore the US, soon! Only three or so days left and then more planes and airports and travelling. Still, I'm excited about getting to England and seeing my brother, meeting his fiancee, catching up with the folks again. Sorry we didn't get to hang out more. Kiwi  9/16/2006 10:17:46 AM
Hi there, I couldn't find that entry "Hospitalisation" that you told me to read?? Hope you're doing okay now though?! I was going to send you a postcard or two from England and Ireland but I don't have your address still?! Home now, the wedding went really well!! I had a BLAST - even in a dress!!! Kiwi  10/25/2006 12:49:19 AM
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