*glances up at the toolbar*
There are too many options, here. It took me a week to get an entry going, just because I couldn’t choose between all of the fonts and colors...and useless preferences.
Which is rather fitting, I think. There are just too many options!! *screams and rips out hair*
Take my education, for example. I’ve been to three schools in as many semesters. I’ve made up my mind to stick around at the current one for another semester or two. And then? I’ll be transferring to a four-year. But which??
There are so many schools…I don’t know if I want to move away from home, towards Tim (the boyfriend)…away from Tim….do I want to be by the coast or the mountains? Do I care about class sizes, so long as they have a kickass English Department? I should consider myself lucky. I know that I love my major…I know I’ll be happy doing damn near anything that relates to it.
But what do I want to do? There’s teaching (which kind? Grade school? High school?)…and publishing (editing, I think. But there are many fields in that line of work, as well)
I’m leaning towards publishing. There’s no defined major for that – or school – though journalism comes close. Journalism implies that I’ll be working with newspapers. I LOATHE newspapers! They’re the devil! Sound bites and flash and garbage and political manglings!
…so it’s safe to say that I want to veer from that line of work. But “publishing” is associated with it, so I’ll be walking a wire there, trying to stay in the field of literature.
Hmph. Stupid decisions. I’ve given myself this summer to decide which direction I want to go in. By the beginning of fall, I really need to nail down what school I want to transfer to. Yikes.
(It occurs to me that I’ve only brushed upon one facet of my indecisiveness. I’ll continue in another entry. Next up, relationships…)