| 30 is the new 20...right? |
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Dear Face,
I’m not sure if you got the memo but I am going to 36 next month and believe that zits of any kind are completely inappropriate at my age. I have already let the whole “crows feet” thing set in, so if you wouldn’t mind throwing me a bone and eradicating my mid-life pimples I would greatly appreciate it!
Signed,
Old pizza face
Dear CEO Nouveau,
I realize that you have never worked in an environment like this one and spent the last 23 years of your career in the same place, but might I make a minor suggestion that you not celebrate the accomplishments of the over-paid consultant while simultaneously dogging the other 20 employees around the board table? This makes for a slightly miffed workforce
Signed,
Sat-Three-seats-down-on-your-left
Dear Liv~
Momma loves you and is seriously working on her patience, but can no longer tolerate 2:00am wake up calls to “pass you your “yogi.” You are going to be three in the fall and have a nightlight…yogi is probably under your butt or pillow…please just grope around for it like a normal child would as opposed to screaming at the top of your lungs, making me think you’re having a major emergency and then promptly falling back to sleep once your favourite stuffy is tucked under your arm.
Love you, but you are high maintenance…
Signed,
Momma baggy-eyes
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