tomorrow is my surgery.  not a day goes by that i don;t think about you.  i just have this nagging feeling that you are thinking of me too.  If anything happens to me , know that  I will always love you.  I don;t understand why you have put me through this again or why you do the things you do.  But for some reason, you feel that this is the path you need to travel.  Do not think that i did not want to fight for you.  I did.  I do.  I just needed to protect my heart.  I can only handle so much.  I could have fought harder for you if you had kept her out of it and let me fight.   All we needed was a chance.  Its all we need now.