|A hard life did this to me.|
I just went back and read a bunch of old entries. And quite honestly, it makes me very sad.
I was so angry... so confused... Having feelings girls at that age shouldn't be and because of that, I didn't know how to deal with what was going on. I tried so hard to be tough, like a bad ass or something. Something that isn't completely me. Don't get me wrong... my rage can be pretty brutal but that's not what I'm all about, despite what some of my guy's friends might think. I was a sweet kid who was completely consumed by some puppy dog romance that went bad. Wow, poor me.
I'm completely different now. Still the bitch I once was but more evolved. I'm still with my boyfriend Blake, we're coming up on two and a half years now. I'm happy. Just as a cross roads, I suppose.
I don't really talk to anyone anymore. It makes me sad sometimes. I don't have anything in my life that's only mine. You know what I mean? All my friends are Blake's friends.
Ugh, the old me is a real downer.
Oh, by the way my little brother's birthday is today! Happy 9th, Robert! LOVE YOU!