i'm annoyed, like really fucking annoyed. as i am writing right now, im in my apartment surrounded by the four ppl who should care the most about me...my mom, dad, sister and childhood friend. And being in this situation has made me realize...none of them give a fuck about me. Of course theres the occasional time when they see me out right deppressed and will say something, but other than that theyre all so fucking selfish. i'm done, so ridiculously done with this shit. fuck this, fuck them, fuck me.

How many ppl out there really care about me...not just care about my existance but about ME? none. fucking no one. how many ppl no the real me? not a single person. im pissed. for the first time i hate new york and wanna go back to fucking bronxville of all places. im so sad. being in this house with these ppl for nothing but two weeks has made me regress to the sad/pissed off person that i was before. i dont wanna be that person. i was finally me and now i've been sucked back into being lost. je suis perdue....il faut que je me trouve...

ps...i hope who ever reads htis doesnt think im some psycho lady...i only write when im pissed. which should explain the last two entries.