I know why I want to see Colin. It's for very selfish reasons of course... I'm starting to think more and more about why he wants to see me... You see, I'm meant to see him tomorrow on his lunchbreak. Yeah I know really silly, blah, blah, blah... I'm not too sure what I'm going to do yet. Part of me desperately wants to go and see him, another part of me (my conscience I'm assuming) feels really sick at the thought of it. Part of that feeling has only really come on today and part of the reason for that is because of something he mentioned to me just before (yes I'm back communicating with him again, blah, blah, blah...). He was telling me how he wasn't happy in his job and wants a change, I said that change was good. He made the comment that change is good sometimes, but once reality sets in things can be very different. He also said he is thinking he might go overseas for a while... It just made me think why does he want to see me. Why is he saying certain things to me that make me question what I feel about everything!?

Ella has woken up... I'll continue later!