i used to write in here before. about four years ago. now i am back because i dont understand live journal. i know im an idiot.

i have these problems with my friends about, well, my boyfriend. okay sorry, this is not a question to send in to seventeen magazine. but this particular friend of mine that has this particular problem was the very same person that hooked us up in the first place. to be honest that is besides the point. anyways so we have been having these talks about me not spending enough time with others, which at one point WAS true and it was really wrong of me and i get reminded of it almost all the time. and it makes me cry. now this particular friend has a boyfriend that for the past two years have been on and off. a big fiasco happened two weeks ago when her boyfriend started pouring beer on her and yelling at her at this party. this broke my heart andi wanted to kick his ass so much, and she said to me (actually  many times before) that they were over, and two days after that he comes over.

i know she has had her things in the past with doug, my boyfriend, and i understand that she doesnt get along with him. but the crazy thing is, i respect rosa's (my particular friend) decisions to whatever she thinks is right. even though i may disagree. but no, she cant comply with anyone's elses feelings or decisions.

i love her and i love him. im confused.