|Raised on Promises|
It's just barely past 8:15pm and I'm in bed.
I turn 30 tomorrow. Two words: Holy crap.
I just spent the last 30 minutes or so (oh, did I mention I actually got into bed at 7:45pm?) looking through my old entries. Of course I lost a lot of them in the Great Diary Hack of 2004. Mostly my engagement and trip to Australia. Those of you have been around for the duration remember that stuff. I lost a lot of entries during an import as well when I scrapped my first diary after Emma died. Not only did some entries not transfer over, but 95% of them have been cut short, like mid-sentence half way through the entry. I've held on to them, but I think it's time for them to go. I'm starting a new decade of my life. Again: Holy crap.
I was thinking about the last 10 years of my life and a lot has happened. And I am going to attempt to remember where I was for my birthday over the last 10 years.
May 28, 2002: I was in my summer semester at BYU-Idaho. I was MISERABLE. The good news about this time though was that I was about to meet Andrew for the first time in person. Andrew actually confirmed his tickets for his trip over on his birthday, which had been May 23, 2002. I turned 20.
May 28, 2003: I was working at Capitol Yamaha. My grandpa died. Life was all over the place for me. I turned 21.
May 28, 2004: I was still working at Capitol Yamaha, but was at the Folsom store. I had nothing but trouble with Eric and The Truck. I was preparing to go to Australia for 3 months. I turned 22.
May 28, 2005: I was still working at Capital Yamaha. I went to my best friend's wedding. My coworkers took me to a strip club and they paid for me to have a lap dance. I can't hear the song "Girls Girls Girls" without flushing bright red ... even still. I was 7 months and 1 day away from my wedding. I turned 23.
May 28, 2007: I was working full time for Emma. It was my first birthday as a MOM! Andrew was at AIT and I was living at Mom's house. I turned 25.
May 28, 2008: I was living the dream in Arizona at our first duty station. For our birthdays, Andrew and I went up to Tucson for a few days and had some quality adult time. I turned 26.
May 28, 2009: I have absolutely no idea what birthday was this year. It is a complete blank. We were in Arizona, Sophie was about 8 months old. I know she was in the hospital at the beginning of May of 2009. But my birthday is a COMPLETE blank. Given the time of year and the fact that we were approaching the 1-year anniversary of Emma's death, I'm guessing that's why it's a blank. I turned 27.
May 28, 2010: My golden birthday, celebrated at Fort Rucker, Alabama. We went miniature golfing with our neighbors. I turned 28.
May 28, 2011: I was in California, helping Mom recover from her surgery. Extremely uneventful. I turned 29.
May 28, 2012: I have no idea how to say Happy Birthday in German and I'm too lazy to click over to Google Translate to look it up. That's how much I care.
When you think about all the stuff that happened inbetween those birthdays, a lot has happened in the past 10 years. I moved away from home for the first time. I got engaged and then married. I buried my grandpa, grandma, uncle, and aunt. I had 3 beautiful children and buried one of them. I have lived in 4 different states and a different country. I can't even begin to fathom what the next 10 years are going to have in store for me. While I was closing up my windows and putting clothes away, it dawned on me that 10 years from now, Sophie will be 13 and JJ will be 11. Andrew and I will have been married for 16 years. We will have more than likely moved 3 to 4 more times. Andrew will be 4 years away from being able to retire at 20 years in military service, should we stay in. And that's just the obvious stuff.
I was trying to think of what I want to accomplish in the next 10 years. What do I want to accomplish in my 30's? What do I want my 40 before I'm 40 list to be? I need to think on that some more.
Tomorrow, my plans are simple. I'm getting a manicure and pedicure at Franken-Therme, which is apparently an awesome German day-spa. I'm going to softball practice in the afternoon. And no, I'm not rethinking the manicure. Even if it only lasts a few hours, I'll be happy :D I hope to hear from Andrew at some point tomorrow, but I'm not going to hold my breath. Things are way crazy over there and I'll hear from him when I do.
I'm 30 tomorrow.