So i had a dream about X a few nights ago and it has really messed me up. Dont get me wrong, i really love U and am loving the way things are going. Ok, its not fireworks and butterflies but its real and for once i know i have found someone who loves me unconditionally. But the dream about X made me think. I mean i know we never had sex or offically dated but for the most part of the last 10 years he has been the main guy im my life. I always thought i loved him, but then after getting with U i realised i had never really loved him but now i cant stop thinking about him. Its wierd. It just feels like unfinished business. Hopefully it will fade completely once im moved to Stoke. 

Moving on things are ok. Im starting to worry about leaving now but i know its all gonna work out as long as i have U. We have run into a few problems in regards to the house. Basically we are supposed to be sharing with 2 other girls but one of them has got family issues and doesnt know if she can move in. This sucks seeing as the landlord doesnt know that im gonna be living there, so if they rent the room out to someone else and they arent happy about me living there they could kick off and we could get kicked out. Apart from that im kinda excited. Still shitting it about leaving my lot but i know im not far so im trying to put that to the back of my mind. 

In other news.. D just got out of prison and had the audacity to add me as a friend on FB. I havent accepted. Its not that ive not moved on, i just dont wanna be reminded of him everytime i see one of his status'. Also, the new landlady at the pub continues to fuck up. She has run our of beer near enough every week since she has been there. What an idiot. She has already fucked me off by cutting a load of my shifts. She tends to call me at short notice and offer me more though so i am usually coming out with over a hundred a week. We are managing to live off that and bank Us wage so we have money in Stoke if i dont find work immediatley. The bike is still fun, i have done nearly a thousand miles on it already and now have a new helmet and a bike jacket i found on ebay so i look awesome!! I want a faster one already, it tops out at just above 70mph because its a cruiser and isnt meant for speed but to be honest i think thats a good thing cause i cant rag the ass of it and get myself hurt!!!

Anyway, im gonna go.. im trying to keep my eye on jobs up in Stoke so i can think about starting to interview.

Oh and i do have more news... today i found out i passed my couse. This was kind of a given but still, its nice to know!!!

k xxx