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HappyHairyHippie


Age: 35
State: Massachusetts

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Bike shop guy Saturday, January 16, 2010

Two weeks since I left my job, and not much to show for it.  I need to get the kids working with me to clean out a classroom area in the basement, and I need to really do some research into homeschooling.  I'm certain I can do it, but I want to make sure I'm doing it correctly.  I don't want them to suffer because I am taking them out of school, I want this to be a good thing for everyone.

My husband had a short day on Friday at work, so we ended up spending much of the day together while the kids were at school.  It was on the tip of my tongue all day to say something to him about all the gay porn on his laptop, but I never went through with it.  I'm tempted to bring it up indirectly by talking about porn first and then leading into it, but I'm not sure if thats really the best way.  I also don't want my questioning him about it to seem like an accusation.  It really wouldn't be. 

I volunteer with a local domestic violence shelter, and although I don't give them as much time as I'd like, one of the things I do for them is distribute their flyers to local places that post community-type things.  I keep a stack of these flyers in my house, and will randomly take them with me if I am going somewhere that I think might post one.  A few weeks ago, I decided to stop into a new bike shop that opened nearby and see if I could post a flyer.  The guy behind the counter readily agreed.  I ended up staying in the shop for almost a half hour talking to him.  When I walked out, I realized I'd been flirting.

We exchanged email addresses at the time.  I started emailing him a few days later and we began emailing back and forth.  After about a week of that, we exhanged phone numbers.  Over the past week I have talked to him on the phone almost everyday.  I have a crush on him.  I can't deny it, although I would probably not admit it anywhere other than in my diary.

When we talked yesterday, he suggested that we meet up this weekend for coffee.  I neither agreed nor disagreed.  I'm thrilled by the idea, but I worry what it could lead to.  Am I strong enough to resist?  I know better than to jeopardize my marriage, and I suspect I am really more excited by the attention than anything else, but I'm not sure what to do.  I want to see him.  But where do I draw the line?

I might be making too much of this.  He might just be looking for a friend. 



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Oh dear, a laptop full of gay porn and attention from a nice guy in a shop. I dunno. If you're worried what it could lead to then be careful.  [Anti-Arnica] 1/16/2010 10:08:53 AM
Be careful, but don't throw away a potential friend just because signals are unclear at this point. [ToyMan] 1/16/2010 11:05:41 AM
I dunno...I think hubby would feel hurt if I met up with a guy friend for coffee. Unless my guy friend was gay or had been my friend for ages...I think I would be hurt if he met up with a girl for coffee too.
I don't think leveling with a guy helps much either because you're still at risk for an emotional affair. Prevention is a great place to start.  [trying539]
1/16/2010 3:07:24 PM
i dont think it would be bad to bring up porn indirectly to lead into bringing up the gay porn subject... i had an ex-boyfriend who used my computer sometimes and i totally found many sites with "chix with dix" type of things...i never talked to him about it...and out relationship dissolved over other issues...but i can imagine how nerve racking it would have been would i have had to approach the subject with him...good luck with this all. [zucchini] 1/17/2010 9:26:59 AM
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