I submit to you, my beloved Brain, a simple request;

Go fuck yourself.

-CF

I am a walking contradiction. I tell people they need to go out, dance, have fun...

Yet I have social anxiety.

I go out, but not often, and I tend to be a wallflower. My friends do, of course, keep me company, but I stay at the table or against a wall somewhere.

CF doesn't dance.
(well, okay, there have been a few alcohol fueled moments)

I once was told that I'm very cocky for a person with such low self-esteem.

Explain that one.

I'm sure I'm an absolute gas to watch. I'm not an unattractive person, so I do from time to time get approached by random young ladies while out. Usually, they're fairly attractive.
(though some could have scared the devil himself)

Have you seen the guy sitting in the darkest corner of a club (or a bar), minding his own business and trying to enjoy the music and his Stella? Now, said guy doesn't really fit in. Everyone else is probably a little dressed up. Slacks and a polo, at worst. He's over in his corner, most likely in shorts and a t-shirt, just being him, enjoying his own company. Well, then you have (essentially) seen me.

I'm sure that you can understand that when in this scenario, if I am approached, I immediately am overcome by confusion. Does sitting in a dark corner avoiding the crowd dressed in very casual clothing really make me seem approachable?

Now, as said, most that approach me are reasonably attractive girls. This, however, adds to the confusion. There's usually anywhere from 50-200 other guys who are dressed nicely, are attractive  and are outgoing/up mingling and dancing. Yet you approach the guy in the corner in shorts who obviously lacks the confidence to go dance or get up and float the crowd.

Uh-oh, here comes a story via dialogue...
Attractive Girl: 'Hi! How are you?'
CF: -blank stare-
AG: -speaks louder, as if I couldn't hear over music- 'How are you?!'
CF: 'I'm okay.'
AG: 'Are you having fun?'
CF: -blank stare-
AG: -speaking louder still- 'Are you having fun?!'
CF: 'Yea...a blast. I really like this band.'
AG: 'I've never even heard of them, but the drink specials are great!'
CF: -blank stare-
AG: 'Do you want to go dance?'
CF: 'Uh...No, I'm good thanks.'
AG: 'Come on! You said you like the band! It'll be fun!'
CF : -blank stare-
AG: 'Come on!'
CF: 'No, really, I don't dance.'
AG: 'Well at least come out and stand with me while I dance!'
CF: o_O;
AG: 'Come on! What guy doesn't want a cute girl dancing all over them!'
CF: 'This guy.'
AG: -blank stare-
CF: -chuckles- 'What?'
AG: 'Are you gay?'
CF: -blank stare-
AG: 'Well, I mean...not that that's bad...'
CF: 'No, I'm not gay, I just don't like having a girl I met three minutes ago rubbing her ass and tits all over me. Is that okay with you?'
AG: 'Aw! You're such a sweet guy! Let's go dance!'
CF: !!!

Yes...that actually happened.