...risk it all cause i'll catch you if you fall. where ever you go....if my heart was a house you'd be home.

first lets start by saying....he's a safe replacement for him.

for the one who use to exist as my best friend.

he's everything you never were....but at the same time....all of the things i loved about you.

it's an amazing mixture and it catches my attention every so often when i feel myself falling comfortable into conversation with him.

so easy...

so innocent.

and there are no complications.

no mixed feelings.

just the essence of innocence.

no mixed up mumbled up...nonsense.

like a brother.

like you were suppose to be....

before you abandoned me

kyle.

he will be home in 5 days.

needless to say....i am indifferent.

for the first time in my life.

i am indifferent towards the one person i could always rely on.

oddly enough.

i say im indifferent.

yet it's eating me alive.

of course i'll be glad to see him.

of course a majority of my time will be devoted to catching up on lost time.

but it isn't the same.

he left without saying one word to me.

i use to be devoted to you

before you abandoned me

seb.

isn't it crazy how someone can waltz into your life and your whole world becomes this...magnificent-- intriguing new adventure?

 he has saved me from so much misery.

but why am i so jumpy?

why am i so cautious?

why am i so...nervous?

ahhh. but isn't that the beautiful thing about love?

it is nervous.

...it should be cautious.

even though most people jump too quickly into things.

i would never think twice though.

never.

opposite sides of the spectrum.

what a concoction.

it's like being awoken from a very long immense sleep.

i am arbitrary.

i am alive again.

i've been dormant and discontent for so long.

and he saved me.

not only from being complacent...

but from being swallowed whole by my misery.

this is a greater feeling than i've ever experienced.

i can not describe it and these words do not touch it.

i wish you could feel what i feel for just one minute out of my day.

it's breathtaking.

please don't abandon me