|.all these sleepless nights.|
...risk it all cause i'll catch you if you fall. where ever you go....if my heart was a house you'd be home.
first lets start by saying....he's a safe replacement for him.
for the one who use to exist as my best friend.
he's everything you never were....but at the same time....all of the things i loved about you.
it's an amazing mixture and it catches my attention every so often when i feel myself falling comfortable into conversation with him.
and there are no complications.
no mixed feelings.
just the essence of innocence.
no mixed up mumbled up...nonsense.
like a brother.
like you were suppose to be....
he will be home in 5 days.
needless to say....i am indifferent.
for the first time in my life.
i am indifferent towards the one person i could always rely on.
i say im indifferent.
yet it's eating me alive.
of course i'll be glad to see him.
of course a majority of my time will be devoted to catching up on lost time.
but it isn't the same.
he left without saying one word to me.
i use to be devoted to you
isn't it crazy how someone can waltz into your life and your whole world becomes this...magnificent-- intriguing new adventure?
he has saved me from so much misery.
but why am i so jumpy?
why am i so cautious?
why am i so...nervous?
ahhh. but isn't that the beautiful thing about love?
it is nervous.
...it should be cautious.
even though most people jump too quickly into things.
i would never think twice though.
opposite sides of the spectrum.
what a concoction.
it's like being awoken from a very long immense sleep.
i am arbitrary.
i am alive again.
i've been dormant and discontent for so long.
and he saved me.
not only from being complacent...
but from being swallowed whole by my misery.
this is a greater feeling than i've ever experienced.
i can not describe it and these words do not touch it.
i wish you could feel what i feel for just one minute out of my day.