So my husband says that it sounded like I called him at 6 am this morning to rant and rave-(we get up early 'round here), and it stopped me in my  tracks.  After thinking of all the reasons why I didn't consider it r and r-ing, I thought man, I have no life.  Who do I tell all these things to then?  I told him, "well that is why we got married so that we could have conversations, precisely like this."  =)

So after hours going by, carpooling, making reservations for the weekend, talking on the phone and leaving messages for my sister (an r-n-r communal member) running/walking/gasping/dying up this incredibly steep hill, I am now here.  And now that I think about it, this is the perfect place for me to rant and rave. ....and so,

I am pissed! - Well, not so much anymore, at the school systems.  My son was tested by the district, (he goes to a private school this year) and was receiving speech therapy through the district.  He didn't really need it so much this year, but stil needed some work on expressive language.  He gets things backwards sometimes.  Anyway, he was also having problems at the beginning of the year following directions according to his teacher and she just couldn't figure it out.  She kept saying he knows what to do, but is not doing it, etc.,etc.  She usually would tell me this on Friday's, where then I would stew about it all weekend as to what might be wrong?  What is the problem?  Finally I said to her, well what!?  What do we do?  She said if things don't get better we should test him.  I said okay, and didn't wait to see if they got better and went to the district and she recommended to test him when he turns 7.  So we did, and he was just tested.  He had the WISC 4-I think and the Woodcock.  Well, he tested extraordinarily bright said the psych, and the speech teacher said he was far above level for that now.  But, they didn't have any advice.  They said, well what you want to watch out for is that he doesn't get bored and he loses interest in school.  He said that most really  bight kids are not the ones that get A's and B's as they get older.  His teacher (who talked about herself through the whole evaluation) said oh we challenge them.  And they do-sort of.  There might be difficult things for him to do because it isn't engaging.  And, I think that is a problem in school.  I think some kids might be bored because of the method of teaching.  So anyway, I knew this already, but the last test confirmed that he scores in the 95% in nonverbal.  He is a visual-spatial kid to the core.  His verbal scores went from 45% when he was receiving speech for the third year to 82% on this last test.  And I don't know why but they didn't give him the arithmetic part, the quantitative.  He scored,(I think these are achievement tests) up to a 10 year old in certain areas and in all area was an average of the equivalent to an 8. 5 year old.

So I sent the results to a school district that has cluster classrooms for gifted kids, just to see what they say and I wanted to see what they do that is different.  Well, first of all he doesn't qualify because he has to have a 97% instead of a 95%.  Two percentage points difference and of course the verbal doesn't qualify him and I knew that.  I am proud that it came up as much as it did in one year.  What my suspicion is, is that the kid's better capabilites are compensating for his weekness' and vice-versa.  He still would need to take a quantative test but it just seems like if you don't reach that magic number then that is it.  They don't meet the kids, look at other stuff he does-like he is a great artist for his age and has an unusually witty sense of humor. 

What pisses me off the most is that, yes, he will do fine in school, although I think he struggles with the traditional methods.  But, if he were able to be with teachers who could teach to his strengths then I think it would open doors for him that would be amazing.  He thinks he is stupid because he isn't like the other kids.  He fully engrosses himself with imaginary  play and is so creative, it blows me away.  His teacher thinks he is brilliant on some days and other days it is a la-la land day.  I don't know.  It is frustrating.  I wish someone could just give me some answers and direction. 

The other thing is that he is so frickin emotional and is concerned about the entire world.  He asks if he will still be able to hear God if he isn't baptised?  I told him yes.  I converted to Catholicism 4 years ago and my husband and I, until recently, couldn't agree on who would be his Godparents.  I don't believe in original sin, fully, anyway.  But it is a goal to get him baptised this summer.  Also, he asks me what heaven looks like and all the possible ways that he might die.  The other day he asked me for 5 dollars to give to a lady that wanted to buy something but she only had $20.  We were at a fundraising rummage sale. He won an award that says he is always polite and he came home sad.  He said that one time last week he wasn't polite so he doesn't really deserve an award.   He also loves to accessorize.  He loves jewlery and this green robe we bought at goodwill.  He wears it everywhere he can, because it is a starwars Darth-Vader cape, a samurai robe, whatever.  My husband banned him from wearing it to the park because he said, "I don't want you to be known as the weird kid."  I find all of his idiosyncracies delightful and think they are so refreshing.  It is fun.  Some people find him charning and funny and others think I have a strange kid.  I used to have people come up to me all the time on the street and tell me that I was a good mother, or a patient mother, or I have my hands full-constantly!  I just don't want him to develop a complex.

Well school is over with tomorrow.  This weekend we are going camping.  I think I will call my sister.