I'm tired of all of this. Im tired of having to pretend to drink and be drunk because I want to keep our child I didnt misscarry im still pregnant and I know that if I tell him he will want me to get rid of it but I cant do it I just want him to be happy about it and want to keep it but I know it that won't happen and I know I dont want it to ruin things between us but i know it will and im hating it I really am but what can I do about it really its not fair I really never thought that he would ask me to do this I wish we never had to go through with this but it happened and there is nothing I can do about it now I cant go and change the past and I cant do anything to change his mind about it im so confused and tired and I cant even talk to him about it because I dont want to fight about it im just lost