|True to Myself|
I am so tried of peeing, it isn’t funny. Last night I even dreamed of peeing. In fact, that’s what I woke up from. I was in some random place, supposedly on water, in a cubical that was not enclosed in an actual bathroom, and talking to some people that I have no idea who they were; just peeing. Yup, just peeing, well and talking. Oh, and the building was moving the whole time like I was on water, but you know how you just know things in a dream; well, the building wasn’t on water, but it was moving. Guess what I did when I woke up? Yup, I peed…of course in the bathroom and in the toilet, right on!! Ask me how many times I woke up to go pee last night! On second thought, I wouldn’t, because it was so many times that I can’t remember. I have to pee right now actually!!
Now that I have relieved myself, literally, I can move on! : - ) I didn’t cook like I planned to last night; I settled for a big bowl of cereal; can’t go wrong with that. Bobby had a bowl too, Emanuel, I’m sure, figured out things for himself! Bobby kept going to the room last night and lying on the bed; said he was tired. The both of us haven’t slept well all week; I followed him, not wanting to go to sleep, but tired. Sure enough, we both were sleeping and I don’t think it was even past 8pm. I woke up several times through the night, wide awake, which is really unusual; even when I can’t sleep and that’s most the time. I guess going to bed early helped me get up this morning; the alarm before the last alarm went off; I got up, peed, and I was fully dressed and in the truck before the next and final alarm. I know that sounds weird, but I have 4 alarms that go off every morning, Monday – Friday, on my phone to get me up. Not that I wouldn’t get up with just one alarm, I just like the warning and it better prepares me for the final alarm. The alarms are as follows: 5:45am, 6:30am, 6:50am, and 7:00am. Sometimes I might activate a 5th alarm and put the last one for 7:10am. I have to be to work at 8 and I live 35-40 minutes away; traffic sucks! I’ve been battling school traffic since it started back and I just can’t get the hang of it.
Today, I was able to pay $130.00 toward the phone bill that Emanuel ran up. The guys gave me $50 last week and another $30 today, the rest I’ve managed out of my own money, which is the soul income of the house. They donate plasma every week, twice a week to make money. Not trying all that much to get an actual job; I could put Emanuel out, but I would feel bad and the only thing major that’s happened since he’s been living with us, is the phone bill. I don’t pay for water and lights, it’s included in my rent; I pay $150.00 a week, supposedly $650.00 a month. Sometimes that plays out, but really it all works out by 52 weeks in the year to be $650.00 a month! We don’t really have a lot of food all the time, but I have connections with that as well, so I don’t really buy food; just odd and ends when we need them. When it comes to tooth paste, washing detergent, toilet paper, and all that stuff; sometimes I manage to score on those and sometimes I have to get purchase them. All in all, I think we’re doing a lot better than we’ve done in the past; or should I say, I’m doing a lot better and Bobby is trying most the time.
You can’t help who you love and I believe one day Bobby will get the hang of things and he will be grateful that I stood beside him; proud to have me as a wife. I know that sounds like I want some kind of recognition for being the back bone, but that’s not what I mean. Bobby is the love of my life and I will always stand by him, no matter what. In my heart I know there will come a day Bobby will finally understand me and take control, as a man should; I have no problem with that when the day does come. I’m a women; I would love to be pampered!! I’m speaking for Makayla when I say that as well!!!
Anyways, it’s Friday and I have 20 minutes before I leave work……let’s hope it goes by fast!!!!!!!!