I met my Babgygirl in drama class seven years ago this month. Or at least, that was when our friendship really began. I was depressed and solitary through most of the first two years I knew her. I was still mourning the loss of my previous best friend and puppy love. I didn't do anything but read and retreat inside myself or listen to music. I ate so little, I lost 50 pounds because I just lost interest in food and life in general. She was my saving grace, she talked to me and stayed with me all that time. Giving warmth and life to my cold, dead self. I can talk to her about absolutely anything and she does the same and both of us know that no judgement or censure will ever come.

One night, something incredibly crazy happened, and of course this is precipitated by the fact that the both of us were drunk as all get out. We ended up, somehow, having oral sex and fingering each other. I don't know how it happened or what started it but I do know that it happened. I was terrified, so much more had happened between the two of us than had happened with my last best friend. I was so scared that I would lose her too and I know that if I had lost her at that point I would have died. Miraculously, to me at any rate, we actually grew even closer as friends. I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't live it. We are closer family but we don't consider each other as family per se, because that would be like incest. I'm not really sure how to describe in words the relationship between us. It's a little fucked up but I'm fine with that as long as she stays by my side.

I will do anything for that girl and I know she'd do the same. I have pulled her out of debt, out of danger, out of relationships, and once picked her up from jail. She has pulled me from the brink of suicide, from debt, away from a bad boyfriend, and out of harm's way. I love her with everything I have and will until the day I die. But it's this platonic love, mixed with a bit of past crazy intimacy. I'm sure I screwed this whole thing up and anyone brave, or stupid, enough to read this all the way to the end is just sitting and thinking to themselves, what the hell is she talking about?