V and I decided to keep the baby.
More accurately I decided to keep the baby and told him he didn't have to have any part of it if he didn't want it, he is reluctant but hasn't run yet. I didn't intend to trap him into a relationship and I still don't intend to do that. I just couldn't take the pills I needed to take. I figure there is a reason for everything including that.
Right now we aren't financially stable but we're both smart and I don't see an issue with us getting financially stable now that we have to. He's looking for a job in San Diego... he wants to move there because his family is there. I want to go back to AK because I want my family more than anything... mostly my sisters.
We're hopefully going to get an ultrasound done in the next couple of weeks so I know how far along I am and what my due date is. I'm fairly calm right now but I'm sure that will pass.
I'm already getting nauseous when I eat and that makes me sad. I really don't want to throw up so I'm just eating little bits of food at regular intervals right now. V seems to be okay of course he is primarily in San Diego right now. I very much wish he was here but, alas, we do not have a place for both of us to stay right now.
I'm just hoping we can work something out soon because... seriously... it's stressing me out to live this way. With him 2 hrs away from me and me in a place where I have very little space, no personal time, no transportation, and no money. In the city there are more jobs and public transportation. I'm no stranger to the bus and it doesn't bother me to take one. I just want to be semi-mobile again. /sigh/
What worries me the most is the weight gain. It scares me to think that I HAVE to gain some weight. Granted not much because I was overweight when I got pregnant but still I have to gain. It scares me to consider morning sickness because I can see that being either a trigger or an excuse... I don't want that.
I just want things to start falling into place... /sigh/.
Hope everyone is doing well... all things considered I've been worse lol.