I can't believe how emotional I have become. I went from crying once my whole life (when I was 17, at my gradma's funeral) to crying, or fighting tears, at least once a week. Living in Seattle is making me go crazy. Also, I'm 99 percent sure my birth control is fucking me up. Sometimes I wish I never would have moved to this place. People here are very passive-aggressive, they have no common sense or courtesy, and they act like they deserve everything in the world just for being alive. I can't stand the fact that they are so goddamn elitist. It has been beautiful lately, so I won't complain about the weather for now.
Last night I was talking to Grace and I missed her and Grand Rapids so much. I started crying on the bus when Cory and I were heading downtown. He knows how I feel about Seattle and he is willing to move when we are both done with school in three years. I don't know if I can last here another three years. It's so hard because if I go back to Grand Rapids I will miss Cory so much, and if I stay here I will keep missing Grace and my family and everyone else back home.
I'm not sure what we are doing today. Cory and I might have a picnic at this really cool park I just discovered in Beacon Hill. It overlooks the whole city from a southeast angle so you can see the stadium and ballpark and West Seattle and the islands. I discovered it when I decided to take the 60 bus to Capitol Hill. Bad idea, btw. It took an hour and twenty fucking minutes! A couple hours later I was running through the arboretum with my flask of Rumpleminze. I'm hoping to hang out with my brother tonight. Either here in Seattle or he mentioned something about driving down to Aberdeen to hang out with Sabrina. I need some good laughs.