| I miss me |
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Today started out so good between us. You called me in the morning, it was so great to hear from you in the morning before I left. I sent you the gtr pic. I called at 345, and you took time out to talk to me, I was so appreciative that you did. I sent you a message when I was leaving, and when I got home, and you responded. But then something changed at night. I called at 830. You didnt answer. I texted you to see if you were still at work, and you replied saying no you left on time but you were in the zone when I called. I understood, in all honestly I understood. But I did want to talk to you considering that you literally wouldnt be able to talk for 2 days. So I asked if you were still in your zone, I would really like to hear your voice. No response. You called right back and I said that I just wanted to wish you luck and you said thanks. I then said "I didnt mean to interrupt your call". And you snapped. Seriously, did me apologizing deserve to be snapped at? You said it irritated you when I do that. Do what!? Now you're the one assuming something. But whatever, I replied with you do shit that irritates me too so dont get on me. We went back and forth. I said I'm just trying to be there for you. That is all. We then went into a fake normal conversation. I told you that I will definitely come over after work . We said goodnight. But I just had to call back. I had to know what I did irritated you. But you said you couldnt talk and that you would explain it later and we hung up. I started crying hysterically. It just added to the impending break up. Gave you another reason didnt it. I dont get it anymore. You asked me in the beginning of our relationship to not shut down, now you chastise me for being open. I dont know how to approach you. I dont know how to talk to you anymore. I cant win. No matter what I do , what I say, how I say it, you are never happy. You always find something wrong, or create something wrong in your head. I cant keep proving myself to you. I'm not going to let you get to my new found happiness. I'm not going to let you bring me down anymore. You're dead weight now. You're just a body of mass. No emotions. No life in your body. I'm sorry you're going into surgery. I'll be there for you for the next couple of days. But once you heal, I will end it.
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