Food

I realise that I haven’t written in a while and I surely hope that you are not too disappointed. I have been having a bit of trouble with certain things. One thing is a problem with feeding myself. The students’ restaurant has changed ownership and as a result it has changed many things. As we all know, people do not like change, and I am definitely no exception. It seems as if they hired many little inexperienced girls to do the work, which means that the atmosphere there is not as warm as it was. Everything feels cold and just too commercial. I’m fed up with standing in line and paying too much for something that I won’t be able to eat up entirely anyway. This leaves me to having to cook myself, which I don’t like either. The problem is that I have a small problem with my oesophagus, which means that it isn’t good for me to eat too much in one meal. And I won’t be able to do that either, even if I wanted to. Cooking more than once a day is too much effort. I have to eat more smaller meals per day. Basically, I have to eat all day long. And now to adapt to this new regime where I don’t go to the students’ restaurant anymore.

 Sometimes I do not eat enough.
 
This eating problem gives rise to another problem. As I am busy thinking about what I am going to eat, and when, (for example, trying to eat one bigger warm meal at 1 pm without having eaten anything beforehand) I can’t think of anything else. Focussing on my MA thesis is terribly difficult. I had hoped to have written something last Saturday, but that is a day on which it is traditional to have fun, which meant I didn’t do anything (I also did not have fun). Having decided not to eat a warm meal today (only bread), I did, luckily, manage to do something today. I edited and thought of the new sections to write, without thinking about food further. At 5 I did go to the students’ restaurant, but after doubting a little while I left without buying anything. I should stay clear of that place from now on and have packets of one-pan meals ready at home.
 
Always wear earphones. In that way you don’t have to listen to other people doing what they’re doing and having frivolous and stupid discussions. This may give me the focus I need to graduate and to function in life generally.
 
I may have schizophrenic and/or autistic characteristics. So far I am hanging on and using tricks and mnemonics about how I am supposed to behave (which may come naturally to others) I will be fine in the end.