Things I Have to Do
I am not happy. I have to work to change this. I can not stay this way for long.
1. I have to focus on changing things that I can control, not things I can’t. Must set personal goals based on my own behavior, not on the outcomes or the behavior of others. For example, I can control how I behave towards Heather, I can not control how she reacts. I have to focus on the part that I can control, that has to be my goal.
2. Distract, distract, distract. I need to meet people. I need to do things. I need to distract myself from my own thoughts, at least until I can reframe them.
3. Be optimistic. Simple enough.
I’m sure I need a longer list but I heard in one of those seminars on taking control of your life that you shouldn’t be working on more than three things at once. Apparently I have faith in this.
I feel uneasy about the e-mail I sent Heather due to the reactions here – I was just trying to be honest. I’m not trying to make anyone unhappy. I still believe Heather wants to know how I feel and I put honesty before the feelings of others, I guess. I don’t want to make anyone unhappy.
Distract. It’s funny how that seems to work as long as you never stop distracting yourself. You have to constantly surround yourself with people or events, and even then, memories still creep into your mind. Good luck!
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Sitting at home alone with your thoughts is the worse thing you can probably do. I definitely suggest to try to get out and do things, but you also do need to process your feelings before they can go away. The most important thing, in my opinion, is for you to be happy with yourself because until you are, you will not achieve positive relationships with others.
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Oh, Matt. I don’t think that you should be worried about the e-mail at all. I think that she does really want to know how you feel and I think that it is a good thing that you sent it. It’s good that you are being honest with her. Don’t be uneasy. I’m glad that you are setting goals and they are very good goals. You could even try to look for a seasonal job while you’re off from school.
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A job will help you meet people and will distract you like crazy because you’ll be so busy. Plus extra money is a huge plus!
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ryn// good to know. in that case… i think that writing the letter wasn’t a bad thing. i probably would’ve done the same thing.
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no matter what, honesty will always rise to the top. may not always be sooner. but later is better than never.
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I make lists. Like this one. Matt, I am glad we talked yesterday and last night. I think, in a way, it helped me too. You know how to reach me.
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RYN: the child with the different wreath loves it because he feels special making these prjects. His teacher last year just told him he couldn’t make a project or made a holiday one instead of making it “non-holiday.” His parents say he can make a few holiday items but the less the better…they get upset if he makes a lot of holiday items.
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I use the distraction one a lot…I fail at it because I allow myself too much time to think. Good luck with your list love.
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Good plan. I like it.
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Honesty makes things run much more smoothly, even if the honesty isn’t something you want to hear. Those goals sound good, but remember, don’t distract yourself too much from your thoughts, or the first moment you have to yourself, you’ll come crashing down. It’s what has happened to me. I’ve been nonstop busy and now that I have time to myself it is crushing every single time, because I’m not managing myself correctly. Just be careful, Matty. In all respects. I’m here, if you need me, or want me.
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I agree with Jenni! ~I’ll be
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Good list, man.
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