More Happy Endings!
So plenty of feedback about my last entry, most of it concerned about the legality (prostitution) and also the appropriateness of what I was suggesting. Of course there were also a few saying – well hey if you guys are both fine with it, then whats the beef.
Firstly, I guess I am somewhat confused about where on earth people were figuring prostitution into the process. Providing a free hand job to a client if they would like it is hardly prostitution. I guess in some peoples eyes they may wish to see it that why. But Babe and I would not. In any event prostitution in NZ is legal. Hell why wouldn’t it be, worlds oldest profession.
So then there’s the issue about appropriateness. Look I can totally understand that in a conventional relationship this would be probably a difficult one – but I have been on the earth long enough now to realise there is no such then as "conventional" anyway. I mean who’s the judge? So long as those involved are all in agreement and adults – then that is all that is needed.
Give you an example. In our papers the other day it was reported that membership of a UK based Internet site which assisted married men and woman to hook up with each other for no strings attached sex had an substantional increase in members during the heavy snows. Total membership was over 350,000 people now. So there is a situation where married people our having affairs without any knowledge of the other partner. And heaps of them. Bloody near an epidemic. Sure there are lots of reasons why people have affairs and you will know them all. But generally an unhappy sex life is quite a common reason. Why is that, cause sex just becomes so darn boring in most peoples marriages. It sure did in mine – before I met my new Babe.
Frankly we have allowed religon, for the most part, to totally screw up our perspective of nudity and sexuality. And then confuse it all with love and commitment. I have no doubt that is why the US is so backward in these areas. Gosh. last year I was in Europe for 3 weeks. mainly in Germany and Austria, and every hotel I stayed in had large spa facilities available. with as many as four different type of sauna’s as well as spas etc. Everyone one of them was mixed and full nudity was just a given. No hang ups, just enjoying the pleasures of the facilities provided in mixed company. Sadly these don’t exist in NZ and that will be because of our British heritage, but even the Brit’s our more open minded on these topics than are the US. You only need to see the sort of TV’s programming allowed in adult viewing times in England vs what is allowed in the US.
So while I accept this entry is a little all over the place – what i am trying to say is – that if people were a lot more open minded about nudity and sexuality I strongly believe marriages would be a lot stronger and a lot more fun. Marriage is about love and commitment between two people. It does not provide some sort of ownership rights over one another. However honesty and trust are also essential in a healthy marriage. so having affairs behind the others back will eventually lead to a breakdown – well mostly. But having a relationship where you introduce sexual encounters with others – in what ever way you are both comfortable with – adds considerable spice to the sexual part of your relationship believe me.
How many OD’s have I read where one person is so unhappy about living in a sexless relationship. This all confirms that a good sexual relationship is generally very important in marriages. I for one know exactly what it is like to live in a sexless relationship and frankly I don’t want to be in another. Neither does my babe. We are totally committed to each other and very much in love. But do we we enjoy sexual expereinces with others from time to time – hell yes we do enjoy it. And we then have many wonderful romps as we relive those expereinces in verbalised erotic banter between us.
So back to the matter of the "happy endings" for the occasional client in my Babes massage clinic. Can’t see any harm in that. I mean how many guys out there would say no to that if it were offered. No many I’d profer. And whats wrong with that. For many of them it probably exactly what they’d do to themselves when they got home anyway. And we all know its always better when someone else does it. Do I believe it breaks some form of martial trust. Actually no I don’t. Obviously it would be best if the guy could tell his wife about what had happened. Of course most wont as their wives would go berserk. I mean why – over a hand job. No doubt most of the guys wouldn’t have had one offered by their own wives in years.
Oh well, said enough I think. will leave it at that for tonight.
Here’s to more "Happy Endings"
SIR, I AM 100% BEHIND YOU ON THIS! Well said and with the right amount of humor (e.g. …wives would go berserk.) ROTFL So, prostitution is legal in NZ? Nice! I think in the USA, in addition to the Puritan thing, there are men in positions of power who never got ANY in high school, and they are still pissed. SO, NO fun for anybody else!
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Because of our general sexual repression, I believe Americans substitute food for sex. We are quickly becoming a country of obese sexless prudes. No one would complain if you handed out cupcakes after a massage. If Kel can generate the income and you are cool with it and it’s all good with the legal powers that be, go forth and be a full service provider. Have a most fab day, good sir.
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good argument
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RYN: I feel the same way about Chiropractors. We’ll see how I end up feeling about therapists in another couple weeks.
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I disagree with Girl1sc. Please provide evidence that our country is sexually repressed. I’m not understanding how you can label all americans as “sexless and food crazed” because I certainly am not so I don’t appreciate being labled by someone based on assumptions. As much as I disagree with sexual encounters outside of marriage, there are many other people who actually do agree with it.
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As for nudity, I’m for it…in most cases. The human body is a beautiful thing and I think it would be appropriate to disrobe in certain situations, i.e. saunas, the beach, spas,etc. That is an entirely different subject than handjobs in a massage parlor though. Like you stated, if it’s something a married couple is interested in, then so be it. Have fun. That’s a personal choice.
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“Marriage is about love and commitment between two people. It does not provide some sort of ownership rights over one another”. Okay, are you saying that if a husband didn’t want his wife to carress another man, he’s controlling her? Or vice-versa? Let’s leave it at this – whatever a married couple chooses to do is their choice, no one else’s and it’s the right choice for them and their marriage.
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Other than personal reasons, I don’t necessarily have a problem with prostitution… oldest profession in the world. It makes sense! Why should the government have control over someone’s body? I get it. However, I certainly wouldn’t want my husband involved in prostitution and with the global epidemic of sex trafficking, it’s becoming a little more serious than handjobs in a parlor.
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Houston (my city) is one of the largest ports in the world when it comes to sex trafficking! We have many underground parlors with underage girls forced to perform sexual acts for customers. It’s disgusting. Now, if the profession could somehow create strict guidelines and practices to prevent the exploitation of children, I’d be fine with it!
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So basically what I’m saying is – 1. I don’t mind prostitution as long as it doesn’t affect me or underage children. 2. You know your wife better than I do and if this is what you want, then that’s your business. 3. Nudity is ok, so long as it doesn’t negatively impact children or become sexual. 4. If you’re happy, then nobody else’s opinions should matter but everyone will always have one.
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Lol, I feel like I have written a book with all my notes! As for your note, yes, I teach pole dancing classes. All of my clients are over 18yrs old as some of the moves are sexual in nature. The girls wear shorts and a tank top but I always offer the opportunity to dress a little more provocatively… you know, to spice things up and make it fun! It isn’t as accepted as I want it to be but…
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it certainly is gaining more popularity here in the states! It’s a wonderful way to get in shape and tone your body! It also helps women get in touch with their feminine and sensual side. It definitely makes you feel sexy but I also teach it from a sports angle as well. Some people are intimidated by the sexual nature of it so I instruct some as if it’s a sport…which it is. It’s a lot of fun 😀
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Howdy! RYN: Yeah Danzig has been around since the sixties, but I just found out about him a few months back. He’s the original. What I understand is that until the huge earth-moving machines arrive and smooth out the destroyed main arteries, everything is jammed up.
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I never teach what is found in clubs (lapdances, trashy moves,etc.) and even though it can be sexual, it’s harmless and goodnatured fun. No touching, obviously. I teach women the fitness benefits of poledancing and also how to feel sexy in your own body. The only way to show you what I mean is to post a video. It’s appropriate for all ages,similar to ballet, but on a pole! LOL. I’ll post one soon!
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Oh, and I also wanted to say that I appreciate your maturity and ability to debate an issue without name calling – as it is rare to have a good debate here on OD! Haha 🙂 I do respect your side and your beliefs so thank you for listening to mine.
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RYN: I am trying to get out of the commission part of the business and move into the operations side of the business. There is a recommendation that both properties be combined and I serve as the liason between the residents and employees to the owners for both developments.
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The two of you have to do what is best with you – and forget everyone else 🙂 So the comfort of nudity thing – I 100% agree. I moved to Korea for 2 years and they have public baths where you walked around in all your naked glory – I was proud of my body and felt really comfortable when I was naked. I’m sorry that they don’t have these here – one of the things I miss most!
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RYN: Yeah, I think ethnic hatred is everywhere! I’ve heard of the Maori…not too familiar with your history but it sort of reminds me of America’s Native Americans…basically the same thing here except they really don’t expect anything. It’s sad what happened to them though. Currently I’m planning on a degree in psychology and then graduate school for Law. It’s ambitious but I’m excited 🙂
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I have often said I wish that the English would have burned all the Puritans at the stake rather than send them across the ocean because the United States is still reeling from their insanity hundreds of years later, but maybe they didn’t have enough stakes and matches. 😉
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Oh, and I forgot to say that prostitution is generally defined here as payment for sex. Sex isn’t limited to sexual intercourse. Here, someone getting paid to do massages and hand jobs would be considered a prostitute even if there were no intercourse involved. Wish prostitution was legal here because it would eliminate a lot of crime associated with it. Who’s it hurting anyway? I just don’t get the morality police. Just wanted you to consider your laws and what might be a problem for Kel giving “happy endings” when someone pitches a tent.
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RYN: Thanks for reading. I have thought about an OPEN MARRIAGE, and I am sure he would prolly like that, but HOW DO I GO ABOUT…asking him? I am afraid that if he isn’t down with it then….what will that do to the marriage? We have two children do not want to break up the family b/c of my sex drive 🙂
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I’m so excited for you daughter – that’s amazing. I worked in Jeonju about 4 hours away. Tell her to bring a yrs worth of Tampons they have them but are expensive or at least when I was there. Also bring tooth paste – I don’t like theirs. Oh and one more thing – an open mind. There will be things that drive her crazy but if she stays positive it will be the best thing to happen to her.
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Ryn: actually my mom has been married to my step dad for 20 years! She just chooses not to spend much time with my sister and I.
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