Hello beloved diary people. Its been far too long. A lot has happened and a lot has changed.
To recap where I was when I last wrote:
Penn and I broke up because he cheated on me with a girl that has the same birthday.
I quit my job back in April because it was killing my soul.
I took 3 jobs to replace that money the best I could and the struggle is real.
Some of these things have changed.
Penn and I are still broken up. I forgive him for what he did , but I cant forget the betrayal. He has asked me to come back several times, but i now I cant do that.
I realized that even with three jobs, (Uber, Food Delivery & Lyft) It didn’t come close to the money that I had been making. Making my car payments was all I worked for. I am lucky to have the friend that I have and that I did not end up having to live in my car. I cant tell you how close it got.
I started submitting resumes back in early May. I had a few interviews. I got hired as a school bus driver but it was going to cost me money to get the licensing and I wouldn’t have actually started working until the end of this month, so I declined that offer. I had a few phone interviews that went well but obviously they decided to go in different directions.
I even went to this “interview” for a company called rule of 9. I got called for a 2nd interview, it was the Wednesday after I found out about Penn cheating. I held my shit together the best I could but when that motherfucker asked me to GIVE HIM 900 DOLLARS so that I could learn the “Proprietary methods” I about fucking died. My car battery died that morning and I didn’t have the money to buy a new one, my heartbreak was still incredibly raw, and then this dude asked me for a grand. I got in the car I BORROWED to go to this interview and promptly fell to pieces. I remember that day very vividly. Once I got home, I got in my bed and cried for the next 3 hours until I fell asleep. I was just crushed.
I applied for jobs to do anything. I looked in both states to either side of the one i live in. I applied to work at home gigs, I applied for manager, supervisor and regular employee jobs. I even applied for things Ihad never done before, like pest control ( they pay pretty damn well) and NOTHING.
Through all of this I got closer to my friend Roshi. We have been friends for a while but it was more peripheral friendship. He is the one that helped me get a new battery into my car. We talk all the time, and hang out on occasion. One day we were talking and I told him that everything would start changing in the solstice. Im a believer that we live in cycles. this is just the way it goes.
Bam! the solstice hits and everything starts to change.
good stuff, but i tired so ill write more tomorrow. For now, suffice it to say , Im good.. thank you all so much for your love and s upport 🙂