2.21.21 2.0

I am sleepy. I have gotten a lot of stuff done today. I did not manage to walk 5 miles today either but I did another three. I also soaked in my tub and that made my muscles to feel much much better than they had. I have to read for 30 minutes yet, because I havent done that. I also need to bring down the last of the 5 boxes I unpacked today.
I have a box of stuff for a yard sale as well as a bag of shit that shouldnt have gotten packed and needed to be thrown out. I am surprised at the amount of stuff I was able to deal with today. We are hindered because we need bookshelves. That will be dealt with soon. I need to paint my black shelf we will likely do that this month too. Basically I am using my time beginning now to prepare for my sisters visit. I want it to look like I have actually done something and made progress in terms of moving in.

Chloe was out of bed most of the day but then towards the evening complained of a sore throat and another headache. I want to so badly say she is faking but the longer this goes on I dont think she is. I think shes sick and I am worried its covid. I dont know. I am worried. I think I am going to register her for a test and have Jeff take her. I have been holding out because I know that if you test too early its a false positive. I dont know. Ugh I hate this shit.

I cant go to social security tomorrow (I forgot about 2 speech therapies, an occupational therapy, and a phone call). With the progression of symptoms I wont be leaving the house until we get her test result. Tuesday I have my appeal appointment with my lawyer because social security says I am not disabled and Finn’s diabetes appointment. I am dreading both appointments actually and I will probably need to be on my anxiety meds to even survive.
I am trying, but life is really hard right now as I sit here and look over all of this.

Also, I miss facebook terribly and I miss carbs. But I am gonna keep going (though I have some deep inner BPD thoughts about the radio silence from people I used to interact with daily). I am envisioning my video of me weighing myself after 40 days of low carb and no weighing myself. Its helping a little.

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