Cheers.

I am trying really hard to get back on the healthy-bod wagon. We only have 2 more months (ish) until we move to southern Florida, where, in case you didn’t know- its a million degrees you can’t hide in sweatshirts everyday.

I’ve been starting small. I used to work out 5 days a week, eat extremely healthy, and balance all this fairly well. I used to feel great in size 2 or 3 jeans, and while I’ve always hated certain parts of my body, I still had many days where I felt confident enough to wear a tight shirt and sexy jeans without sucking it in all night. Now those size 3 jeans are too tight to wear with pride. My ass has been growing and growing with the increasing level of stress I am under at work. The stress however, has been subsisding ever since we made the decision to leave in a couple months (imagine that), and now I am ready to get my body back.

It AMAZES me what stress can do to your body! I never really knew because I never quite had so much of it for such a long period of time. Short bursts dont cause as much damage as these months of headache.

I haven’t started agressively working out yet, but my diet has been reigned in over the past week. Today I did good with the diet and ate just over 1200 calories. I’m using sparkpeople.com again (finally) which always helps me wonders. I walked and sweat for 40 minutes while talking to my mom on the phone. I cleaned the house, vaccumed and did laundry all day today. I could have been doing more the past 2 hours than eating dinner in front of the TV and doing things online. But- alas. We have to start somewhere! I’m hoping Paul and I can do something fun tonight because I’m off again tomorrow. Whenever I don’t do anything even slightly fun on my day or 2 off, I go back to work feeling like I still need a freaking break. Work is…a lot to deal with. When I’m PSMing its almost unbearable. PMS and work combined means I will be *near* tears multiple times a day. Near, but not there–god no. I will not cry at work. I wont cry over work either.

I love my job, don’t get me wrong. I just don’t some of the bullshit that goes on, and the fact that sometimes it gets me worked up. But I love some of the people I work with there, I love the respect that I get and the team that I get to be a part of. I love making decisions and giving people information. I love leading a team and being there for people. I love helping my team as well as the guests that pay good money to spend their day with us. I love writing people’s schedules and accomodating what they need to have a life and still getting what I need, making both parties happy. I DONT like it though, when i cant make everybody happy. I love a sucessful night of service, like last night, and I love planning it all out and hearing "thank you" from my senior leaders at the end of the night. I love writing professional emails and people coming to me for answers. I dig it all, but I do not dig the union drama and anyone else greedy bullshit. I do not love people who are only there to get a fucking paycheck and could care less about giving good service. I hate greed in general and people who are spiteful. FUCK IT.

My cat makes all the stress go away. He’s sitting beside the computer right now, watching me type like he always does when i’m on the computer. Maybe he’s facinated by it? Or maybe he can read! He likes it when I write about him.

That 1200 calorie mark is going to be a little off, because now i’m on my 2nd 64-calorie beer and i dont see it stopping anytime soon.

Jason’s dad is coming soon with a bag of pills. Paul is quitting smoking in the next couple days, when what cigarettes he has are gone. We’re planning a big move and promotions and when to start a family and I don’t see how the hell we’re suposed to have our cake and eat it too.

Third eye blind has a new cd, so i’m downloading it and exited for the best! Cheers to 1999!