Mental Health Break

I’m taking a few days off work to reset. I struggle with negative thoughts on a good day but found myself just sitting and staring at my computer screen and completely unable to focus on anything. My dog has been sick for the last week and a half, he picked up a case of kennel cough when I had to board him. This also meant he couldn’t go to daycare. I’ve had him in daycare since he was 4 months old back then I was working in an office so it made sense to have him go 5 days a week so he didn’t have to spend all day alone or in a crate. When the pandemic hit I kept the daycare up b/c he would bark constantly when I was on calls and taking him to daycare in the mornings and picking up in the evenings did a really good job of separating my day so I didn’t work from wake up to bed time. Having him home the last week and a half has been really nice! I’ve been getting up more from my desk to take him outside and he’s grown out of the barking incessantly phase. His daycare bill is *expensive* at almost $400 a month. He absolutely *loves* going there and gets so excited and he also gets to be around other dogs and other people. But the more I think about it the more I’m considering just taking him a couple of times a week. This is the first time there’s been an outbreak at his daycare and I certainly don’t blame any of the staff. They’re absolutely wonderful and treat him like he’s their own. Hell, I’m pretty sure he loves a few of those people more than me at this point! The daycare has been closed for the last week as they try and figure out what caused the kennel cough and he finishes up his antibiotics tomorrow so I really think we’re just going to go a couple of times a week going forward.

Photography has been on my mind a lot lately. I’ve started a new thing where I don’t really look at the pics I take for at least a week, sometimes longer, to let the high of being out shooting pics wear off. This has made a pretty big difference in how I view my pics. I get excited all over again when I finally start sorting them and going through the editing process has made me a lot happier overall. I’m still trying to push myself to get out and do more street photography. It’s really scary to be out in public with a camera these days. People automatically assume the worst and I get it, I really do. I haven’t had anything more than a few weird stares so far but those have been enough to make me uncomfortable. I look at photos every day and I want to get out more and shoot but I just keep talking myself out of it. My goal on one of my days off is to go to the closest “big city” and take some street shots.

My health stuff has been going really well. I’ve averaged about 1-2lbs loss per week which is right where I want to be. I’m adding a few of my old foods back in and testing my blood sugar at 15min after and then 2 hours after to see how my body reacts. So far everything has been normal. I had some Mcdonald’s for the first time over 5 months and my fasting blood sugar was well within range the next morning. I’m not going to over do it this go around b/c I don’t want to end up right where I was before and I want to do my best to avoid dealing with any long term issues down the road related to the diabetes.

My September Apple watch goal was to get 67.2 miles in workouts for the month. I completed that goal about midway through the month and have continued to add to that total. I’m extremely proud of myself for doing that! I’m up to ~93 miles for the month and might be able to make this a 100 mile month which I’ve never done before! I also picked up a dedicated pair of running shoes from Hoke and I have to admit they’re fully worth the price. My legs don’t feel as heavy after a run/walk and recovery feels a bit shorter as my ankles and knees don’t hurt as much. This watch has really been a game changer for me. I want to “close the rings” but I also don’t want to have this become something unhealthy. I did drop my calorie goal by about half as I found I was really worrying about getting the original number. I’ve been hitting my calorie and exercise goals with my morning run and typically end up around the same number as I did before lowering it. I’m going to keep it where it b/c my anxiety about hitting it is practically non-existent at this point. I’m in a good groove so I’m going to let things ride for a bit!

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September 29, 2021

I love my watch for the same reasons. I don’t think I could wait a day, much less a week to review my photos. Good for you for having that discipline! I mainly shoot people and they want to see them, too, so that’s another incentive to get them edited.

October 1, 2021

@solovoice Don’t get me wrong, it’s a huge struggle not to look at the pics immediately but the benefits I’ve found of being happier with the pics I’ve taken outweigh that initial rush and sometimes disappointment. I’ve been doing more street photography lately so people see that I’m taking pics I don’t typically interact with them. I want to capture the rawness of people interact with others and with the environment.