Recent Entries

• Better Day

  March 2, 2022

  This morning I woke up without the heaviness of depression and I was so glad, how good that feels!  When I took my cpap mask off I said to myself that I hope my new Cpap mask would come, it was so uncomfortable so imagine how happy I was when my phone rang and it…

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• One Step Forward…

  February 28, 2022

  ...Three steps back.  It can go like that with bipolar and I think winter is really getting to me as well.  It has been beautiful the last three days and that's been so nice, blue skies and 30's.  The forecast looks crappy for Saturday though, 3" inches of rain and snow expected and I'm so…

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• Happy 2’sday

  February 22, 2022

  I woke up too early today after a night full of bad dreams ugh.  But I am determined not to let that ruin my day.  I told Brie that and she said, "Good job mom!! I'm so proud of you!!" and then she sent me this saying, "You really have to discipline and train your…

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• Peace

  February 21, 2022

  Today I am thinking about that in going through my divorce was something I never thought I'd recover from.  The pain and heartbreak that left me on the floor crying and thinking that I wouldn't ever find peace again but somehow I have.   Isn't it funny how you can experience things or situations ...

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• 2/19/22

  February 19, 2022

  I couldn't think of a title for this entry, depression is rearing it's ugly head.  It started 2 days ago and I think it started when Chels had to cancel our lunch. I'm really lonely and I think that's some of it too although it feels chemical.   The wellbutin was working so well up…

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• Crazy Brain

  February 17, 2022

  I get the worst images in my head in a nanosecond and it's so hard to deal with, especially on the days it's really going.  I am constantly saying "shut up head", that's the only way I've found that helps the most in dealing with it.  I don't watch the news and I don't read…

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• This and that

  February 16, 2022

  It's been a couple of days since I wrote, guess I couldn't think of anything interesting to say.   I am so enjoying these days of Brie's sobriety I cannot tell you and it makes me feel at peace with the world.  The up and downs and the stresses when she is using are so…

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• Soul Searching

  February 14, 2022

  The past entries I've read have been both good and bad.   The good memories are priceless of course and I loved rereading them again but the sad times were no fun.  There were a lot of sad times.  I've been through a lot in my lifetime. A lot, but I stayed positive through it…

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• Bad Idea?

  February 11, 2022

  I went back to 1999 on my diary and I don't think that was such a good idea.  Too many struggles and heartaches we went through.  I did have so many friends on here though and  it  was so great reading their notes, and made me feel grateful for them once again.  The friendships lasted…

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