Recent Entries

• the lasts of the firsts

  February 9, 2021

  dear spydr, i have grown mostly okay with your absence, but there are some days that are, naturally, harder than others. we have entered the last month of the firsts. birthday. valentine's. the anniversary of losing you. it's been hard. the weekend was good. i had fun with The Crew, laughing all ...

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• there’s just so much!

  November 19, 2020

  time to chronicle what's happening. so. listy time.   - neighbors nothing is happening. it's all the same. i'm pretty sure they just signed a new lease. AWESOME. i am so tired of the four a.m. wake up call that is their fighting. ugh. and she is a screamer. not sex-wise, though she is probab...

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• nervous breakdown

  October 12, 2020

  dear spydr:   ...been a while since i wrote. i find it's easier to say what i need to when it's in the form of a letter to you. i also find i need to have my craptop serviced - the keys are sticking. LOL ahhh, life.   i wish you knew how missed you…

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• noise ordinance

  August 23, 2020

  i cannot stand my upstairs neighbors. the family consists of a 2 year old (adorable)0 an 8 year old (cutie, but troubled and defiant) and mom. (mid twenties, totally incompetent.) i get that the kids will be up early, running around, and being kids. i have nothing to say about that. what i DO hav...

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• 8 more days

  July 14, 2020

  Sugar Says...   i have started counting down to the appointment i made with the new cardiologist. 8 more days, and i'll have an idea what's happening. i am both excited and terrified. mostly terrified. and i don't really have the words to explain why. it isn't like he'll be giving me the sca...

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• making an effort

  July 6, 2020

  dear spydr... summer is harder here in new england, at least for me. it's hot and humid, just like back home, but unlike down south, not every house has central AC. in fact, most do not. i am afraid i have become very spoiled with the florida way of life. since there is no AC…

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• not naked, still afraid

  July 3, 2020

  dear spydr... i have been avoiding you. i'm sorry. it's been a hell of a ....few weeks. there's so much for us to talk about, and some of it uncomfortable, but i don't even want to delve into all that right now. the only thing i came to say is....my god, i wish you were…

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• infectious

  May 26, 2020

  dear spydr... turns out, sadly, i was right. i called my doctor in the morning, the next day, and as we were speaking, i was inspecting the area i was almost sure was infected. you know me, i did what they do - i marked off the spot where the redness ended with a permanent…

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• various

  May 25, 2020

  dear spydr... i wish you were here with me. it's been a stressful several...months, if we're all honest. and now i have a sneaking suspicion that there's a bit of a cellulitis infection in my leg. yes, my love, again. i know. but let's give credit where it's due - it's been over a year…

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