Recent Entries

• You Are My Sunshine

  March 22, 2023

  Dear Mama, I am sitting next to you right now with this new comfy blanket and I believe I can't *ever* talk to Billie or Taylor again in this lifetime and it is not even because I want to in the next. I want to be clear by love was always the dream of telling…

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• Jesus melt the chain

  March 21, 2023

  Dear Mama, I am praying to Jesus and letting all that does not belong to my heart melt away. I let myself feel the sequence of events all the way from that sexual assualt to what I so naïvely thought was an agreement to marriage, through all the pain snd deception of not really knowing…

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• The Unabomber

  March 20, 2023

  I suppose the first order of reputation management that I want to consider is that somewhere in my first Open Diary as I remember when Charles was kind of egging me on with reverse psychology to say the sorts of things that could get me in trouble I felt like I had a freedom to…

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• Crushes and Jesus

  March 20, 2023

  It is nice to have a crush but at the end of the day I may be a-crushual too until Jesus finds me someone I know I have his full consent to crush on (and it is the wisdom of Jesus in my heart that will tell me that). So at the end of the day…

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• Jessica

  March 19, 2023

  Dear Mama, I don't know if you know but I should finally say something about this because it feels like one of the last things to unravel. I don't know how but do you know the Bellevue family though I do not know who and in what ways exactly was abusive towards me? I never…

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• What love means

  March 19, 2023

  Dear Mama, It is like every day you give me at least one daily clue to solve the puzzle. Today I am thinking of when I got a new camera and was excited to start taking portraits of people I thought were friends and put them in frames because the first time I tried to…

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• Worried about Mariah

  March 19, 2023

  Dear Mama, I couldn't pay attention to that movie but I liked watching it with you. It felt good to hear you say I love you I love you I love you and to somehow feel safe saying it too makes me even more sad that he is not gone so we can talk like…

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• I love you, Mariah

  March 18, 2023

  Dear Mariah, I have one last thing to say to you. Thank you for understanding that I have to stop these letters and connect to my own heart. I want to tell you that, I don't know if it was true since I am recallibrating my heart's compass and trusting the intuition of my heart…

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• Clearing

  March 18, 2023

  Dear Mariah, I think if Billie is my friend she will not be hurt if I simply clear my own heart and suppose that she is not, though my only intention was to never, ever hurt her anyway, so I am at peace with that. Love, Willow PS -- if my heart is my own…

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