On death

A guy that I went to school with died in a car accident yesterday & it really made me look at life differently, as death usually does to people – it wasn’t the cliche “seize the day because you don’t know when it will be your last” though, it was more of a “seize the day simply because it was given to you”.
It really made me feel like an ungrateful brat, that I get to be alive when other people die every day…and all I do is disrespect the life and the body that I have because I’m angry & feel like life owes me something for all the shit its given me; but, I realized that life is not indebted to me, I’m indebted to it. And ultimately, I’m indebted to God.
I don’t know, maybe everybody else already knew that, but I just figured it out.

I also thought about how I act like such an ungrateful brat because I feel like I have nothing to be grateful for because I feel like I’m pretty worthless; and I justify feeling that way because “how am I suppose to believe I’m not worthless if everyone treats me like I’m worthless, and no one believes I’m worth anything or tells me I’m worth anything”…and I am honestly just now realizing how much of a lie that is – I am surrounded by people that tell me I’m not worthless, all the freaking time! I just refuse to listen. Because I’m stubborn.

Well, I am done being stubborn.
I mean it.
(I might have to be reminded from time to time though)

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Good for you.

April 20, 2012

It’s so sad to hear about people dying so young. This past year we lost several kids from my graduating class. Surprisingly, all from some sort of organ failure/malfunction and not from something tragic. 🙁 We all take life for granted, but do your best to just live it from now on.

April 20, 2012

If you have your health, you are blessed, plus beauty double blessed. Don’t listen to the nay-sayers who tell you differently! They put you down to help them feel as if they are higher; I get so upset with people that do that to others. You have every right to live and be happy! I’m so sorry to hear of your classmate’s early death. That is sad. Love, Liz