Adrift

Stop! Breathe. Just remember to breathe.
I Am enough. I am enough. I am enough. I chant to myself. Somehow this has become my personal mantra. It is the counter to the constant invasive”You suck.” I’ve been hearing echo in my head for years.
It’s kind of working. A little. Sometimes.
Am I having another identity crisis? No idea.
Who even am I? Again I’m not really sure.
when I describe myself I describe who I am to other people first. But who am I when everything is stripped away? I don’t know. I like crafts I suggest.
I just feel… alone. I feel scared and misunderstood and not authentic. But who am I authenticity?
I know the labels I’ve collected. The things that give the me part of me meaning. Is that who I am?
I really don’t know. Parenthood has set me adrift.

Just talk to me! Please I’m begging you to say one thing about the way you feel. I feel so un anchored. Please just tell me about your frustration. Your anger. Your resentment. Your sorrow. Anything. Anything at all. I feel exposed. I feel broken. I wish you would show me the broken parts of you too. Just talk to me for once about something that matters!