I’m a video game

I had a dream I was in a video game. I was this bad ass comic book warrior chick with long strawberry blonde hair, massive calves and TITTIES for days.

We were in a medieval town… dodging evil wart hogs, snakes in trees, and sharks in the the water while we battled soldiers in between. Oh we… Yeah, Baboo was with me and he was supposed to be doing the dodging, but he’d cling to the sides of buildings and i’d be left to do the dodging, even though he was better at it. I had a giant massive flaming sword and I kicked ass.

There was also some part where we were battling witches and demons in a giant haunted house.

I AM A VIDEO GAME.

I also woke up sounding like a pterodactyl.

Is that’s how it’s spelled?

If there was a more stupider spelled word…

Oh wait.. there is!

I’m gonna shoot Webster and his friends in the face.

I mean seriously. Why does our language have to look so complicated and weird.

I’m all about phonetics.

but somehow, schooling drills shit into your brain and when you try to spell that way, it feels weird.

I meen. cum on. thee efort it tayks to do this is not worth the eese of not worrying abowt speling riyt?

or something.

watever!

and then when words are actuallhy spelled "right" when I’m trying to spell them "wrong" makes my brain hurt.

oh brayins!

Anyway!!!!!

I got nothing. I’m just rambling. I should go do something productive.

Have a lovely Friday and a great holiday weekend for all the peeps and poops that get to celebrate it!

and if you don’t, the man is cruel and he should be ashamed of himself.

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  Last Words (A zombie apocalypse survival diary, for your reading pleasure and future knowledge when they take over the world. Yes, I am the author.)