Maybe alone is better then the abuse

Day in and out I get attacked from his family I’m the bad one I can’t take care of my son I’m lazy I’m fat I’m selfish I have everyone watch my son while I do nothing I wanna sleep all day I ask his parents for everything I can’t survive without him and his family I can’t take my son away we’ll make you look like an unfit parent you can never leave you have to deal with his abuse you cuz him to get angry you don’t do what he says you have an attitude problem don’t talk don’t talk to anyone unless he says it’s ok you can’t go anywhere unless he says it’s ok your not skipped to do anything unless he says it’s ok. I get told this day in and day out everyday his mother who is mentally ill lies about me to whoever is willing to listen to her. I get told go to therapy you need help your the problem so I go but I don’t tell my therapist what goes on in my house really cuz I’m scared he’ll tell cps and get my son taken away from me and then I’ll get yelled at kicked out and they will naked sure I never see my son. I get threatened everyday and it’s gotten to the point where I have no where to go and no one to turn to and those who have tried to help me in the past get chased away by him. No one sticks around long enough to help. I feel like I’ll be one of those stories you hear on the news women killed by boyfriend during domestic dispute boyfriends family claims they knew nothing about it. Just another soul lost and then everyone forgets about you no one cared to see if you were ok it doesn’t matter what people say to you oh just run I can’t he and his family will find me drag me back and eventually kill me so I’m stuck

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May 29, 2020

Go and find and call an organisation that helps abused women. even if you have an anonymous phone call with them, it might be helpful.

May 29, 2020

@journalsecret thank you

June 3, 2020

No one is going to drag you anywhere.  It’s all talk and thought.  Once you take action, you will realize that no one can stop you.  They don’t have the authority, the power or the right to hold you back from going elsewhere and living the life that you want. Write a police report about your abuse.  When the police get involved, the cowards will tuck their tails between their legs and go hide in a corner.

Any other life, anywhere else, is better than being abused. Period. Being alone is not so bad. I’ve been alone for years.  It’s a great way to find yourself and find out what you want to do with your life.  No one will hold you back.

Rightfully so, no one should. Your happiness, your purpose in life, and your son are the 3 most important aspects of your life.  Enjoy your quiet times. Write down your thoughts and plans.  Document everything.   Please continue sharing your feelings.  People are here for you.