The beginning of everything

Like any other story it begins with an open door. A tempting open door with a promising future.

8 months later the pain is unbearable. It turns me into just an empty shell of functioning person with a bleeding heart inside.

It was a mistake to pursue this. A mistake to want to feel a life. A mistake to want to feel and let my self consume in the high. A mistake to think I will not get burn in the fire. A mistake to expect anything else besides a terrible death of heart break.

Every waking moment it consumes me. It pains me. I can’t breathe at times. I feel like drowning. Feel like the walls closing it on me.

Is this what loving someone you shouldn’t have to feel like?