Afraid

I wasn’t afraid

when my tires caught the edge

of the broken asphalt and loose gravel.

I wasn’t afraid

when the telephone pole drew closer

almost as if in slow motion.

I wasn’t afraid

when I realized the car wouldn’t right itself

back onto the two lane road.

I wasn’t afraid

when the impact happened

as metal scraped and glass broke.

 

I wasn’t afraid

when the police arrived,

when she made me sit on the ground.

I wasn’t afraid

When she asked me

over and over if I was okay.

I wasn’t afraid

when their hushed voices wondered

about the lack of deployed airbag and my lack of fear.

I was only afraid

when I recognized my disappointment

that yes,

in fact,

i was

still here.

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October 1, 2022

Heart shattering. I hope you’ve found healing and a way through these feelings.

October 2, 2022

🙁 🙁 OMG. hugs