Nord’s Thoughts #4

Hello! I haven’t been very active, have I? Sorry. It’s hard to keep up with something. I write whenever I feel like it, because most days are extremely uneventful.

Yesterday I went out. We were supposed to go to the beach but the car broke down. I got a bag of chips.

I’m going to be mentioning some sensitive topics so uh just a warning.

I got yelled at by my mother two days ago. It got really bad. I can’t live here anymore, I feel unloved. I don’t feel like I can be myself here. This is the reason why I hate myself so much, to be honest. I can’t take it anymore, I have to leave. And I am going to leave. My only friend called her grandma and they’re cleaning out a room for me. I don’t know what is going to happen to me but I really hope it goes well. If I get murdered by her family, you’ll know.

That’s a weird thought. Just something I worry about. I worry about dying a lot. It’s gonna hurt. I don’t know where I’ll go when I die either. My theory(?) is that we’ll go wherever we were before birth.

If I don’t move, I may just run away, and if I don’t do that, well, I don’t know what I’m gonna do.
Thank you for reading! Sorry for being a bit dark or whatever.

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August 15, 2020

Don’t run from your problems. My mum did that when she had me. She moved to the US and left me here in Canada to rot. In hindsight, I reckon that was the best idea bc the joke’s on her. She has to pay for medical insurance. I DON’T!!

August 16, 2020

I hope things work out for you.