Is Sex a Need????

A thought-provoking comment left on yesterday’s entry has spawned this one. “Sex is a need.” Maybe it is, sort of… but when I think of things that are actual “needs” I think about food, water, shelter… the things we really need to stay alive. I also think that it feels like a need to a man, but I think women “need” security in the same way men “need” sex.

Nobody will die without sex (or there’d be a lot of dead middle-aged women and men). However, as a human race, we do need sex or will need to face extinction, but that doesn’t mean each and every individual needs sex, does it?

I’ve read, and tend to believe, that men are “programmed” via genes, etc. to have sex with as many women as many times as possible. Women are “programmed” to have sex with the most genetically superior man they can “catch.” That sure seems to agree with the stuff I’ve seen in real life. And that would explain somewhat, why men consider sex a “need.” I also think that women find it more of a need when they’re younger and are at child-bearing prime. I remember having a lot more physical drive back then. As years went on, the drive became more emotional. There was less general “horniness,” and more desires connected with fantasies. I guess it went from being sort of a need to being more of a luxury. I didn’t, however, mean to foist that off on my husband too. I’m not saying that the luxury concept is a good one… just trying to sort out what has happened through the years.

I’d be interested in finding out what other people feel on this subject. Is sex a need or is it just a strong desire? I don’t know.

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I was tempted to offer a wise-crack here but thought better of it.*S* You are an interesting lady and space doesn’t allow me to answer this question here.

hope all went splendid for the wedding today

I think it’s a desire, albiet a passionate desire. Funny how you can take it for granted in those times of your life when it is pleantiful. 19er

i have a need to connect. i desire intimacy, want sex sometimes. i would not have sex if it didn’t offer intimacy and connection. my mother suggested women have sex for love and men love for sex. i only know what i feel. a world of i’s.

Neither. I don’t need sex, and never desire it. I’m amazed that others even want to! I’m 26, I’ve tried it all out, but I could definitely live happily without it. To me sex is…highly overrated.

January 11, 2005

I love your talk here about sex! It’s rather interesting, and great to see it from an honest, older woman’s perspective (and not another “I know everything” teenager). I’m still impressed at your openness and can’t wait to read more… very, very intriguing.