Abstinence

My exam went very well. I got a 10 (out of 10), so… better than I could ever dream of. Things at University are going very well, I found a group of friends I feel at ease with, I have a job beside my master, I already have a stage for next semester, and I feel as if I am in the right place. I learnt that I am not in competition with anybody, apart with myself.

I am trying hard to reduce smoking. I am a heavy smoker. With heavy smoker I mean really heavy. I mean between 20 and 40 cigarettes a day. That is a lot. My mother was even a heavier smoker than me (she used to smoke 60 cigarettes a day) and she ended up in hospital one year ago (the only true illness she ever had is the damage to her lungs caused by smoking so much all her life long). She had to quit. I decided to try an electronic cigarette. I cannot quit without some aid because the addiction is too strong, my body craves for the cigarette and the electronic cigarette gives some hints of the taste of a normal one – but has less nicotine and I just take a couple of shootings.

I am out for today – too much work to get done tomorrow, moreover I feel the abstinence. Better trying to sleep and not to think that I made the terrible mistake to send a friendship request on Facebook to my ex girlfriend, who most probably just ignored it and laughed about my stupidity. But this is another story.