The pagan friend

Today was a good day at University, I gathered a success on a presentation and my research for Professor Sara was presented in class to first year students. I was present, and it is incredible what that woman managed to do with what seemed to me an amount of chaotic data. She is good. Not those usual mediocre academic “know-it-all”‘s who feel important just because they have the right to carry their title of “Professor”. You know, idiots are everywhere. Also among professors. They might have a huge knowledge of their topic, but be perfect idiots. I had an English Professor last year who had a great knowledge of English literature, which I respect with humility, but who is an idiot on everything else. He is a fascist, homophobe and misogynous bigot.

Tomorrow is a long day, I will not even have lunch break, but I hope to come cross Professor Cristina in the corridors in some way or another. We wanted to have a coffee and a chat. Her proposal. Oh, I do not have illusions. But it is nice to dream.

I talked for a long time with my friend Dani today (a guy). He is becoming a pagan. He prays to Odin and Thor and tries out spells. His girlfriend is a Wicca and she is luring him into her beliefs. He asked for my opinion. That is fine. He asked me if I find ridiculous him making spells, but I replied that Catholics believe that a priest with a few movement of the hands can turn bread and vine into the Body and Blood of Christ, so why not trying spells. For a while, I was a pagan myself, but more focused on old Egyptian gods. I still carry an Ankh tattooed on my neck and the Eye of the Horus tattooed on my right shoulder. The image of Osiris with her son Horus is what became the image of the Virgin with Jesus. It is all the same, however you call it. If you find peace in your rituals, go for it, as long as you do not hurt anybody (including yourself).

I am not superstitious. I used to consult Tarots (I read them myself). This was a sort of ritual, because the room in which you read the Tarots had to be purified before doing it. I stopped doing so because I got scared by the truth of some premonitions. For instance, I saw in the cards that a woman I know would have suffered financial loss due to her marriage with her boyfriend. I did not say that to her. It is an etiquette: if you see something that negative, you do not tell. I just warned her to keep a keen eye on money. Five years later, I got to know that she had married him, that he took a lot of money from her to start several businesses and eventually left her to go back to his homeland and disappear. With her money. During another consult, a (male) friend asked me if he would have married a girl he loved, and the white candle burning on the desk (to keep the room pure) expired. The girl is a lesbian, which he did not know. The girl was me. A friend of mine introduced me to Tarots consulting, and in one of my first consults I asked which type of partner I would have had in the future. She said that I would have suffered loneliness for a while, looking for approval by men older than myself, and that I would have tried to find a master, a (male) mentor, and I was meant to find him. Then she said to me I would have had to accept many things about myself I wanted to deny. She did not know anything about me, she was a perfect stranger. So, I thought that for the moment I will leave this powerful instrument to others and be happy with living every day without knowing what my destiny will be. Dani reads the Runes almost every day and I have the impression that this upsets him, and I can relate. Tarots upset me a lot, because there is some truth in them.

Well, with that being said, I suppose I should sleep and gather some energy to face tomorrow. Writing this entry made me insistently want to start consulting Tarots again, despite my fearing them. I might consider the idea. Tomorrow.

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October 10, 2018

I read the tarot cards for a time and also gave them up when they revealed too much.I still have insight into when others are discussing me – for example I know when an email is being read and if its a good or bad reaction. Some used to say I was psychic – for now I go with my gut instinct. That woreks best for me. I hope you can have that coffee meeting.