Hm….. I seem to feel a little bit better. And by that I mean… everything is still there, but maybe I am starting to feel more integrated. Like I am experiencing the range of emotions rather than stifling most of them. My anxiety is still very high, but usually the depression feels as high as the anxiety. I am talking about how I feel and moving forward, rather than freezing and prickling myself against life. Oh, AND I changed my birth control pills about a week ago. The OBGYN from planned parenthood said this kind is better for people who get mood-swings from birth control pills. It is possible that was contributing to some of my crazy. Hormones are some crazy shit.
I can’t even take them, they turn me into a monster!! 🙈