Self Sabotage


What does it mean when you’ve squandered every opportunity for happiness?

What does it mean to be critical of every nuance

to the point of no longer recognizing serendipitous gifts from the universe when they land right on your lap?

Wasting the very thing you’ve been struggling,

fighting tooth and nail,

and searching so hard for?

This is for those who work to the bone,

with goodness in their hearts,

stretching their little limbs deep into the earth,

high into the sky,

singing,

screaming,

teary eyed,

searching for love and freedom,

only to turn their backs when the gesture is finally acknowledged and returned.

Why do we do this?

Who really knows.

Perhaps we’re broken.

Or maybe we’re stronger than most,

pushing the limits of sanity,

to help,

when others feel they’ve run out of rope.

No matter the situation you’ve put yourself in,

or all the amazing resources you’ve managed to burn to the ground,

you’re a force to be reckoned with.

Don’t give up.

Be kind to your mind,

and allow yourself good things when they come your way.

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September 7, 2022

Just punched myself in the feels today, feeling nostalgic and a little down on my luck. Trying to build myself back up again.
Writing is therapeutic and i just don’t do it enough. Hopefully, these words are helpful for anyone out there.

September 22, 2022

If you find yourself surrounded by chaos, always remember you experienced order first

Its the absence of order that invited chaos to chase after the weak

Emotions can be loud but the spirit causes everything to resonate with it

So with spirit as your sword and the experience of order in your life

Lead your thoughts through the chaos of it all to take out its general

and become victorious again like so many other battles you have already won.