I give up! Trying to be happy shouldn’t be this hard. I shouldn’t have to make this emotion a priority.
I am miserable and feel as if I have no one to turn to.
My husband just won’t stop drinking and he now gives me chocolate just to try and soften me up. Last night we argued because I wouldn’t let him open the Kiddush Wine and just drink it for the sake of filling up on alcohol. He goes on that when I don’t follow through on what I promise to do I ‘EGG HIM ON’ to drink…fucking bulshit!
I planned for us to do something fun today, but I don’t feel like doing that…he is now upset!! He was looking forward to being treated, I guess.
I don’t want to live anymore but I am too scared to take my own life.
Last night on Facebook I was watching Derek Deso and these pranks him and his wife pull on each other. Anyway she got herself flowers and wrote this card; pretending it was from her boyfriend. She let her son read it and got him to promise not to tell Derek who it was from. So Derek comes home and sees the flowers…he asks who they’re for and who sent them. She tells him that they are from her Grandma…anyway there is a whole saga….Derek starts to “CRY” because he believes that the only flowers his wife should be getting are the ones that he gives her. For the past 3 years of my marriage…well I have only been married since 27 December 2018… I have gotten flowers 5 times…I got a bunch of flowers on my bday from my sister and her husband and kids…a few weeks later I got a bunch of flowers from my husband to make up for not getting me a birthday present and the other 3 have been flowers I got for myself!!