My Story…Pt 2 (kinda all over the place)

I am finishing up at work…and like normal listening to YouTube play…

Busy bopping my head to Luke Bryan ‘Play it Again’

She was sittin’ all alone over on the tailgate
Tan legs swingin’ by a Georgia plate

Just those few lines take me back to Easter Holidays back in the 90’s. I grew up in a Jewish Family so those weekends I would spend with my Christian Childhood friend and her family. Generally we would be on school holiday, so I would pack up some stuff and climb into the back of her Step Dad’s Bakkie and we would all venture off to Hermanus and join her extended family for the Easter Weekend.

I suppose that is the only time I was ever on a Tailgate. In fact until I started listening to Country and reading those romcoms of some 

I never knew what a Tail Gate was.

I remember how we used to play barbies all weekend long, We would pitch our tents in the garden, of the house we were staying in, and we would have our own lil camp.

When I look back on my life, I often wonder how did I get so lucky. I mean as a child my life was filled with so much love and I have always been surrounded my family. Kinda sucks how I haven’t been able to have my own family yet…I hope yet and soon I will be blessed with a child or two. I know I pledged to myself and on OD that by the end of next year I would either be pregnant or would be adopting a baby. And as much as I hope that does happen…situations, financial/emotional, often makes me wonder how will I be able to have a child? And how would I be able to afford a child? But then you see pictures, on , of , showing the world their cute baby. And you know how they too are most likely living pay check to pay check…or at least were when they were your real friends, but they can have a child. So I am sure I can too. I mean…I can live eating less chocolate…and throwing money away on stupid things.

It’s Everest, I know
It’s impossible, you’re too young or too old
That’s what they tell you, mmm
So that’s what you tell you too

Such true words…love Gaby Barret’s new song. Funny how you believe it to be true because a professional said that is how it is. After my accident, every doctor told my parents and me, that I would never be able to study again. I mean the lawyers and judge must have believe them, in order for them to have settled on giving me a large sum of money. But I knew they were wrong. I wanted to prove them wrong.

I vowed to one day get my Chartered Accountant degree. I would prove all those docs wrong. Yes I had a serious head injury and was in a coma for a few weeks. Yes I will most likely live my whole life dealing with my unstable emotions and depression, but I knew no one can tell me no, when I had the final say.

So I spent 6 months at UCT. That sucked so much. I had short term memory so whatever I learnt in a lesson, I would have forgotten by the time I walked out of the lecture hall. I spent a lot of time studying just to fail the exam…well get marks that were below my standard.

So I dropped out….

Worked at a Music store for 2 years. Those were great years. Met great people. We would sing and dance at night, while selling CD’s, DVD’s or Games. And on pay weekends we would get all dressed up to go to clubs and dance until the sun came up, just to go home, catch a lil shut eye and then get dressed to go back to work. OOh….one night while working there I met Keifer Sutherland. I also got to see Akon…but he is an ass and wouldn’t meet with the staff after signing cd’s… he was …after signing about 50 cd’s.

Anyway after dealing with late nights, music and dancing and making low income…thank G-d I was still living at home…I decided to go back and study.

Yeah that didn’t last very long…I studied for a few years and after just feeling irritated with young students and teenagers crying 

and demanding free study fees… which is all fair…but it irritates me how they would disrupt classes. Then I was basically in the top 3 of my classes. I had managed to get my  to work properly. But that wasn’t enough. I felt behind. My friends were graduating and I was still living at home. My mother had passed away. I was trying to run a home for my dad, I was working and studying. It became too much for me. So I dropped out.

so I started selling books…figured I could still do it. So went back to studying…but only had to go class a few times a week. I was working every night. I started speaking to my husband on …then he was just a  guy that I seamed to connect with. My dad met a women that I didn’t really like so I decided it was time for me to leave home. (Will write about that some other time)

Then I was rooming with a friend, working and earning pennies…trying to study and spending my nights chatting up this  guy.

I couldn’t do it all. So studies got the chop! 

Anyway a few years pass…I go back to studying. Drop out again.  guy and I move in together. We move flats. I change job. We get engaged. We break up. We get back together. We get engaged. We get married.

I decide to go back and study. Miss an exam because I think I am going to have a heart-attack…when in fact my B12 is just low, hence the shivers and muscle tightness and and spasms in my arms and heart racing. So guess what I put studying on hold. 

A year later I change modules and study something else. I get to the exam and I get about 75%…and BUT Covid hits.

Everybody says that you can’t ’til you do

Not sure how normal things will get. But I will complete my studies, one day. Hopefully next year I will get back to it. I know I wanted to be a Chartered Accountant, but I have let go of that dream…so I am happy getting a diploma…in Bookkeeping and will see where that goes…but next year I intend to pick up a few modules and get a few more B+ to my name.