You know, trying to “see the good” and accepting “life” is hard, well for me.
I can’t accept myself anymore. Worst of all, I don’t remember when I became so ugly and unappealing. I think I have answered my own questions on why people don’t talk to me in public and I always feel like some creepy old guy.
I just don’t like my looks. The old man ugly stick hit me hard. It didn’t help that my ex left me for a man who is almost 10 years older than me.
I find myself just wanting to accept that my time has come and go and I hope that I can find a job where I no longer have to deal with anyone.
I have those days often too, where I look in the mirror and I don’t like how I look. Why can’t I be thinner? Why are my teeth uneven? Why am I so short? Why are my calves so big. I hope you can look in the mirror and find one thing about yourself you can appreciate. Today, I chose my hair. People always have told me I have pretty hair. I am sure you have something too…your eyes maybe?
I never look in the mirror and see pretty. I just see an aging woman…I hate that.