Wow. Tuesday is my crazy long day. Often at the end I’m left sitting here thinking the same thing “Have I bitten off more than I can chew in life?” Sometimes I begin to doubt myself. Question if these are the smartest ideas I’ve ever had. In the end, I know they are all smart ideas. I know I’m exhausted, but I know every single second will be worth it down the line.
I’m still waiting for my college acceptance letter. This is a total roller coaster in my head. How could they not accept me? Then this switches to… I shouldn’t be disappointed if I don’t get in, the odds are low, it’s NOT going to happen. Back to…. This is happening. It really truly is. But really, is it happening? I have NO idea. All of my stuff is in. I’m just waiting for the initial acceptance letter. Then I can’t even apply for the actual program until 5/15 & won’t know for sure until after 6/15. Hurry up & wait. Next month I’ll begin perfecting my essay questions for the program application. I will be ready to submit at 8 a.m. on day 1 of it being open.
Work was as eventful as every other day today. Today’s visit all I could think was “this could have been me”. Honestly, had I not of changed my life. Changed my habits. I’d likely be in this mom’s shoes. This is why I’m successful at what I do. This is why my clients tell me more than most. Where the honesty comes from. I truly, 150% get it. I’ve been there. I’ve done that. However, I also know if there is a will there is a way. If you dig deep. If you truly want to fix things. If you give every ounce of yourself you can change. It’s harder than hell, but it’s worth every second of the struggle. Sadly, I’m realizing that willpower, that desire, that ability to withstand the pain to become better is rare. So many don’t have the ability to find that inner strength; the intense craving to bounce back better; the understanding of how to make it better. This is where our problems come from. How do you teach people this? Are you born with it? Is there a way to learn it? Do these people have a chance? Or are the odds simply against the majority? I don’t have the answers today. I won’t have the answers tomorrow. But if I can help ONE person find this ability within themselves I will have done my job. This is my goal. To figure out what in the hell works. Even to figure out a tiny part of this.
The “side gig” job…. Yeah, not so much of a side gig anymore. I’ve officially, yet again, made more this month than my day job. *sigh* This is why I’m so damn exhausted. However, it’s not worth giving up. I’m not willing to quit the day job. I like helping people. I’m not willing to quit the side gig. I like money. So, continue on with both is what I’ll do. Maybe this side gig will some day make so much money I can devote my time to helping people for free. Hey. Maybe. Dream big! I checked my numbers last night…. I’ve officially grown a “downline” of over 1,000. (I hate to call them downline. We’re a team. I need them as much as they need more. Or really even more. I feel like we’re equals. Really.) Seriously. It’s insane. Together we hit $52K in sales for this month & it continues to grow. With 10 days left in the month I fully expect we will end the month over $60K. Bizarre. It’s insane to believe that I haven’t even been doing this for a year. We’ve built an incredible team. I’m so damn lucky for the amazing group of women I now call my friends. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime. And to think of the amount I’ve helped others to grow, to have that extra income, to find & fulfill their why. Hell, that in itself is worth the exhaustion. Worth more than the money I’m making. So, I signed up for another kick ass, exhausting, 30 day group. Which begins Thursday. Because the farther I can go, the further I can reach, the deeper I can dig…. The better. Who needs sleep anyways?
I was going to ramble more…. But the mention of sleep has me yawning. Ugh, I taught class tonight which is also exhausting. It’s now 10:30 & all I can think about is bed. This will have to be rambled on later 😉
Sweet Dreams world!